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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

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  • WornOut
  • WornOut's Avatar Posted by
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12 Feb 08 #13615 by WornOut
Topic started by WornOut
Just had an email from my solicitor - it appears that we are again going for a Consent Order rather than attend the first appointment (see my posting on here yesterday).

The ex is now asking for a higher price (now only 2.5K lower than figure the FMH is currently being marketed at)to be included in the clause which reads -"the Former matrimonial home shall be sold for no less than £X or such other price as may be agreed between the parties or in default of such agreement as determined by the court".

The above statement has been included in the CO because (1) the ex wanted me alone to bear the cost, should I insist on selling the fmh for less than the ex is prepared to sell it for and (2)should the housing market depress and the fmh reduce in value, I didn't see why I should bear the cost for something which is out of my control.

Whilst I'm ok with the fact that the court will mediate, should the ex refuse a fair offer (within the prevailing housing climate), I feel I may be setting myself up for yet another legal battle. The fact is the ex DOESN'T WANT TO SELL THE FMH AT ALL, because it is mortgage free and he has lived in it for the past 4 years since we separated.

The fmh was supposed to have been offered for sale by June 2005 and since then I've banged on to my solicitor about the injustice of having to pay to put a roof over MY head, whilst HE languises for free in the fmh; the response has always been on the lines of 'tough, you'll have to live with the fact'. What if he is still in the fmh in 2 years time????

I've been advised that I can go to court and get him evicted should he continue to obstruct the sale, but I feel the clause in the CO may well provide him with what he wants without him needing to be actively obstructive!

Does anyone have any thoughts on or experience of a similar situation?

Is there a lever I can use to 'encourage' him not to remain?

Am I entitled to a form of rent for his occupancy of my half of the fmh, once there has been an order that it is to be sold?

  • mike62
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  • Platinum Member
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13 Feb 08 #13767 by mike62
Reply from mike62
I honestly have no idea what you could do in the circumstances.

I see absolutely no reason why you shouldn't charge him rent for your share of the FMH, backdated to when you left. GO get a fair appraisal from a couple of local letting agents, and I think that the £2,500 differential that he is carping about will suddenly disappear!

It might be the trigger for him to think about moving on.

Why not just get your sol to send him a bill for rent, and see what happens?

If nothing else, it will make you smile :)

As you say, he is very comfortably languishing rent-free. Needs a kick in the pants methinks. Good luck with it, and let us know what happens.

Take care


  • unic
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13 Feb 08 #13805 by unic
Reply from unic
my understanding is that occupation rent is not enforceable.
My sol has asked for occ rent (following valuation from rental company) as x2b lives on huge equity whilst I rent. Not got anywhere with it so far

  • maggie
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13 Feb 08 #13810 by maggie
Reply from maggie
I'm worried about enforcement happening to me and would be grateful if anyone can tell me what form it might take.
I'm trying to sell the family home; my share is supposed to buy me a 3 bed house in the same area for 75% of the price of this 3 bed house. I've found nothing half way decent for the right price.If I lower the price to sell quickly I won't get enough to buy the sort of house we agreed on mortgage free as per the Consent Order.
What will happen if my ex goes back to court over it?

  • WornOut
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14 Feb 08 #13841 by WornOut
Reply from WornOut
Thanks for your contributions everyone.

When I posted this thread I focused on one aspect of a telephone conversation my solicitor had with the ex when he rang to arrange exchange of our form E's -the first time in two years he has done what he has been asked to do and by the specified deadline.

What my solicitor also reported was that he baulked over a clause she had inserted into the Consent Order relating to house insurance namely, that he is responsible for paying it. The ex told my solicitor he was worried that, if he was out of work in a year's time, he would not be able to pay the premiums. Now, someone with half a brain would pick up on that statement - so he expects to be living in the fmh next year does he, but to say it to your ex wife's solicitor - arrogance or stupidity?????

What he also told my solicitor is that the house was uninsured last year, presumably because he couldn't pay the premiumns!!!!!!! Great, I could now own half of a shell! Having heard this, my solicitor immediately advised that we keep the insurance clause in and include an indemnity statement. Wow, so if the house burns down and the fmh is uninsured, the man who couldn't afford the insurance premiums will fork out around 70K to compensate me for my loss, yeh right!!!!!!!

After going over the issues with my partner time and time again - I felt physically sick by the end of the day - we came to the conclusion that whatever I do, the ex will remain in the house. My solicitor is convinced that I will eventually have to apply for an eviction order. That being said, my partner and I decided that the only possible way forward is to try and buy the ex's share of the fmh. I never expected to have to pay money out, so it's a scary option!!!! We are in the process of appying for the finance, so I will keep you posted.


I think the key to your situation is that you are 'trying' to sell the fmh - my ex has been obstructing since June 2005. I have been told that I can apply to the court for a notice to vacate, which will enable me to take over the property and handle the sale myself. I expect your ex could do the same, though the court may not issue an order if you can prove that you have been trying to sell it rather than causing obstruction.

My experience of the divorce process and all the other stuff that comes with it is - that the 'baddie' gets away with murder and the 'goodie' pays (very dearly). My feelings are that even if you were a 'baddie' like my ex, it would be a long and costly process for your ex to get you out of the house you currently occupy, so I would say that you are relatively safe for the moment.

Please don't take this as a criticism but, putting myself in your shoes, neither me nor my ex could possibly buy a 3 bed house in the same area for 75% of the cost of our fmh.

The fmh is an extended semi with three bedrooms, two generous lounge/dining rooms and gardens back and front, on the edge of green belt and is currently being marketed at 144,950. Even if we got a buyer to pay the full price, we'd only have something in the region of 70-71K each to spend on a property each.

In the same village there is a one bedroom back-to-back house on a very busy main road, where pedestrians pass literally inches from your kitchen and lounge windows - it is being marketed at 90K. If you are not familiar with this type of property it is a terraced house and, unless it is on the end, you would share a wall with a neighbour either side of you and a neighbour at the back of you. It has only one access door to/from the street (your rubbish bin usually sits next to that)and the kitchen and living room are often combined.

Having described the situation in the area where the fmh is, I'm sure you can imagine why the ex isn't budging!!! Whilst I sympathise with your situation - you have an agreement, I have no sympathy for my ex. I left the fmh to live in what turned out to be horrendous conditions and then was fortunate to be offered a flat by a friend for a reasonable rent - I was a full time student living on a student loan. The tenancy gave me exclusive use of one room (my bedroom) and shared use of lounge, kitchen, bathroom and toilet. If 'renting' was good enough for me, the ex can lower his sights and do the same!!!

As for your question about your ex going back to court - I think the more experience members can give you the answer on this issue. I have a feeling your ex might be able to apply for a variation on the Consent Order, should he decide to try to move things along. He could argue that the current terms are unachieveable.
I wish you every success in your hunt for a new home and hope that you get a good price for your current one.

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