Left STBXH Nov 2010, been attempting to get divorce ever since!
Basic outline of circumstances, together 14 years, married 4, 3 children (2 from marriage, eldest from previous relationship) 17, 12 and 9. STBX living in FMH which I reneted from local authority before meeting him, purchased with mortgage (discount due to my previous tenancy) then approx 3 years later I paid mortgage off with inheritence. STBXH refuses to allow me and children to live there even though our accomodation is with my mum where myself, 17year old daughter and 9 year old son have to share a small room, and 12 year old sleeps in an office. All our belongings are still in FMH due to ther being no space in my mums and refusal from STBXH to allow access to FMH.
Have my Nisi but not getting Absolute until finances are sorted. had FDR begining of Feb, Judge advised we discuss through sour respective solicitors/barrister to try to agree without his intervention. I am unable to get a mortgage due to only begining self employment a year ago. STBXH would not agree to mesher order but wanted to buy me out even though he has not provided any proof of borrowing capacity. (he is self employed, claims he earns £400 pm and outgoings are £1400 pm yet has no debts to cover the deficit) If he was to buy me out I would lose all benefits so would be living off the lump sum as I do not turn over a decent profit as yet being a new business. Went back into court, jusdge then advised a mesher order as we had not reached an agreement. Told us to go back to discuss again. Again, STBX refused mesher order.
Have finally just received final hearing date which is mid june. Am guessing the new judge will be of same opinion (well, hope so anyway!!) Am I right in thinking this??? And if so, how long will he be given to move out as I am tearing my hair our living here for so long!!
Also, how and when do the contents get sorted??? as these have had no mention yet. Or the 2 businesses that he has access to.
Oh, currently he pays £100 per months CM, which just makes me laugh as he is dring a van for his business that I paid for, and a 4 year old discovery that he pays £400 pm for!!!(cos if I didn''t I would constantly cry!!)
Any advise would be gratefully received as I''m rather confused!!
Sorry I''m No expert, but why didn''t you apply for an occupancy order for the FMH???
Your childrens needs are far greater then your STBX''s!! How did a judge even think this was fair that you and children share a room while your STBX is rattling around in the FMH!!
Did you want to leave the area or something?
I''m only saying as my EX broke into the FHM in Nov 2009, and I had him back out in Dec 2009 with an occupancy order. This was while I was pregnant and had no other children. So your needs are greater then mine. I self repped so very simple to do without a solicitor.
It wont be the same judge for the final hearing, in fact the new judge wont hear anything that was said or suggested at FDR, they look at it with fresh eyes.
The chances are the final judgment will mirror what the judge at FDR recommended.
If a mesher is ordered the chattels usually stay in the home, certainly all items needed by children will, the none resident parent usually takes personal items, or others by consent, judges don`t like to get involved with who keeps what from the house.