I am 42 and in full-time employment since leaving school, paid into NHS pension from 1991 to 2006. My income now from private sector at £2300 per month with no pension contribution from my employer whatever.
STBX is 27 and has always worked under 16 hours per week. Income with benefits is £1800 per month
We married in Jan 2006 (cohabit 4 months prior)
Separated in March 2010
I brought my home which stayed in my name throughout as did the mortgages and four ''classic'' cars I was restoring to the marriage, I also sold a piano & other possessions to fund a shortfall in our early life together. I had a debts to my parents for the house deposit.
My wife brought nothing financially.
She had a son from previous relationship (no support from natural father who is not contactable nor in the UK)
He called me Dad and I raised him as my own.
I stayed in the FMH
on separation, and paid her rent & deposit and acted as guarantor. I also gave a further £5000 to help with readjustment and training for a better job/study plus help with childcare (I also sponsored a visit from her overseas mother to help with childcare while she found more work) she took a car and all our savings but the car died so I paid for a replacement for them.
I voluntarily gave periodic monthly payments of £188 for the first year to further support. I was allowed contact for a while but now have had no contact for 9 months though I ask occasionally she says ''He''s frustrated and angry with me when he comes back from being with you, you must be trying to turn him against me'' (not so)
My wife has had £8500 since separation but has now asked for mediation
''for a financial settlement''
My assets - my home (the fmh) likely selling price £142,000.
an old car worth £1000 (nothing else worth over £500)
Liabilities - I still owe my dad £2356
Mortgages - £135,500 plus early repayment charges - estimate equity after sale costs around £3500
I don''t want to give up any part of my pension I built up before I met her as she is young and has earning capacity & a lifetime of contributions ahead, nor do I want to sell my home of the last 13 years
As I see it, she''s had a lump sum sufficient to establish an independent life already (and then some) and has been living independently for the last 2 years.
So what further needs do I need to meet ?
My only assets really are my credit rating and my income (I''m at the top of my salary scale, hers can only increase)