I've been served a petition today (unreasonable behaviour - all untrue, but that's a different story).
Prior to this, my wife filed a Form A and applied for a financial order. Early this month the court sent me a Notice of Response to First Appointment and set a hearing for Jan.
It is my understanding that courts like you to attend mediation before a hearing. My wife has consistently resisted any form of mediation.
With respect the application for a financial order, she has skirted the issue of MIAM and has used the excuse of "exceptional hardship" as the reason why she is not going for MIAM. I've checked and it seems that there is this exception - if you are likely to suffer exceptional hardship you can bypass the MIAM requirement.
This exceptional hardship is a fake claim, there is no exceptional hardship - she's working, I'm working, all the bills are being paid.
Is there any way I can get the court to throw out this application and force her to a MIAM? (I appreciate that she may not cooperate at the MIAM and that all I'll achieve here is a delay... but even that would be enormously useful for me for reasons which I won't go into here).
The way I understood it was you HAD to go to MIAM unless you had suffered violence.
In my experience it was just another ‘Tax’, a bill of £102, complete waste of my time and theirs as ex didn’t want to part with anything. However it ticked the box that I had paid and then could fill in form A for court financials.
You have to give a reason for divorce and UB is the one that covers most things.
You have to think of things as the marriage has broken down, there is no way back, it’s over and this is the expensive paperwork exercise that finalises it, although you can make it much cheaper by agreeing.
Your wife is probably fearing for her future and wants some financial security from marital assets, and the only way to do this is via the courts if the ex is not providing willingly.
You're right, violence is one pretext on which you can avoid MIAM. The other is a claim of "exceptional hardship" ie. that you'll face exceptional hardship if there is the delay of having to go through a MIAM first.
I can prove there's no exceptional hardship so my question is how can I get the court to cancel this hearing and demand a MIAM?
(To address your other comment, I've offered her 50% of everything, which is a very fair offer considering what we've each brought to the marriage, but she's after 100% of the money on the grounds that I'm better qualified and can earn more than her in future! After 20+ years of marriage she wants me to leave with £0. Not sure if her argument will work in court but that's another matter.)
My urgent need is to find out how to force a MIAM and delay the hearing. Does the fact that I'm defending the divorce - and we're a long way from a Decree Nisi - have any bearing? Can I get the first appointment cancelled to await outcome of the divorce petition?
I won't go into reasons, and there are good reasons, but I need to delay for as long as I can even if the eventual outcome is going to be the same.
50% seems a very reasonable proposal! (I’d have taken it!)
I don’t think you can ask for 100% !!! That’s just stupid.
If I were you I would go to court and see what the judge says....hopefully “Dreaming”
What people forget is that their ex other half also is entitled to the marital proceeds and needs somewhere to live to.
Why are you attempting to stall the proceedings, and delay matters?
I've known First Appointments, even FDRs take place before the Nisi has been granted, so your ploy won't necessarily work in the way you wish, and will most likely make you appear [to the other side and possibly a Judge] as obstructive and difficult....