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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

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The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

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Financial nightmare

  • Olim222
  • Olim222's Avatar Posted by
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  • Junior Member
22 May 21 #516778 by Olim222
Topic started by Olim222
Thoughts on my horrendous situation please!!!

Was bullied into a civil partnership in 2014, found out he was cheating in 2017 and he moved out. I paid for 6 months rent on a flat for him then he suddenly turned up to my house again had nowhere to stay so I let him in temporarily ( God knows why). We finally got round to starting divorce proceedings and he said he wanted 40k. Ideally I’d have waited til the nisi was issued but I was getting daily calls and texts from him saying he desperately needed the money, was borderline suicidal and I sent him the money before a Consent Order could be drawn up. Absolute got issued and then I got a letter from his solicitor asking for financial disclosure. Ex then got in touch saying he needed 6k for debts and other bills in order to move on, and that he needed this money the next day. I got a Separation Agreement drawn up which he signed and he also emailed me a note saying the £6k was full and final settlement. I’ve now got a request from the court, via his solicitor, for financial disclosure and an online hearing in a few months time.
I know I should have waited before sending all this money over and will 100000% not send him any more but I was under a lot of pressure to send the money. I have saved all the texts and emails including from someone claiming to be his solicitor advising me to send him the 40k originally.

Financially he’s moved in with another partner, has a nice car and they’re running their own business. The house I live in was purchased by me only before the civil partnership and he’s not paid a penny towards bills or mortgage. The CP was short and no children involved

in others experience would a judge take all the previous money sent into account and the signed Separation Agreement? I really don’t think he’s entitled to a penny more!

  • hadenoughnow
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  • Moderator
  • Moderator
22 May 21 #516779 by hadenoughnow
Reply from hadenoughnow
Did you live together for any length of time before the civil partnership? The civil partnership is short - it would appear to be 3 years to separation - but prior cohabitation would count towards the length of the relationship which may make a difference to how financial settlement is viewed.

In a very short marriage/cp the usual rule of thumb is that each party takes out what they put in. Any profits (e.g. increase in property value) or joint debts would be shared equally.

In a longer marriage/cp the first consideration is needs.

Without knowing the details of your respective financial positions, it is impossible to comment on whether what your ex has already been paid would be considered fair in the circumstances.

If there is a properly drawn up Separation Agreement and what was agreed was fair based on the assets and liabilities at the time, then I would think a judge would likely agree that is it. You would need to show a clear paper trail in your evidence.

If you need help with completing a form E or legal advice on your situation, you may want to have a look at the services provided by this site.


  • Olim222
  • Olim222's Avatar Posted by
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22 May 21 #516785 by Olim222
Reply from Olim222
Yes I have the paper trail, and have paid out over 80k in total which although wasn’t agreed through the courts is all provable and as I say I was basically bullied into it. Thanks for the reply :-)

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