Fear I''m going to be destitute for ever!

I''m still in the early stages of separation but I happen to be someone who just has to plan ahead. As a result I took a look at the Divorce Calculator and put in some anticipated details for my potential future life.

Since I''m the main earner by a long way (my wife has been a full time mum by agreement between us when our second child was born) she only earns a small amount each month for a part-time job.

On the calculator I put in all of my current outgoings, split where I anticipated they would be between us, and added in rent for myself. It seems that the calculation assumes I will effectively pay my rent, the mortgage on the house and obviously maintenance for my children. When it''s all added up I will be lucky to have enough left for rent on a flat with two bedrooms so I can have the children.

Is this right? Is this what I can look forward to in life?

You need to post more details about your incomes, ages, children etc.

You will have to pay CM obviously but spousal maintenance is a different matter.

Bear in mind your ex will be able to claim benefits which will top up her income.

We have 3 kids - 11, 9 and 7. We''re both in our early 40s.
My wife earns 300-400 a month, I earn 2300.
At the moment rental around here is about £750 for a two bedroom flat. The mortgage is closer to £700.

I don''t mind paying to support my wife and children - that''s not an issue. Our personal relationship so far is very amicable. It''s hard to start a new life with literally no pocket money though!

I''m afraid you can look forward to bad monetary times ahead: try to mimimise this as much as possible by keeping things civil with the missus and be very careful not to let a solicitor and barrister get too cash happy as well (if you need to go down this route).

Unfortunately I have had my fingers burnt on all of the above...

confusedmonkey wrote:

We have 3 kids - 11, 9 and 7. We''re both in our early 40s.
My wife earns 300-400 a month, I earn 2300.
At the moment rental around here is about £750 for a two bedroom flat. The mortgage is closer to £700.

I don''t mind paying to support my wife and children - that''s not an issue. Our personal relationship so far is very amicable. It''s hard to start a new life with literally no pocket money though!

Would she be able to pay the mortgage on her own with tax credits and the child maintenance you would be required to pay? How much equity in the house? Depending on how many nights you have children you are looking at up to £575 per month for CM. Once she gets this plus tax credits she will probably be on more money than you so doubt SM is likely to come into it but one of the experts will be able to advise.

Thanks for your help.

I know her parents would be able (and probably willing) to pay the mortgage for her (there''s quite a lot of wealth on that side of the family and very little on mine), but I''m guessing that''s something that never has to be declared even if it''s going to happen.

I''m looking to have the kids at least two nights a week if it comes to it - working makes it impractical to do any more. With no relatives close I have no choice but to rent if I ever want to maintain a relationship with my children.

I would''ve guessed that there could be up to £120,000 equity in the house. Does that make a difference? Will I eventually get a share of that when the kids reach 18? I''ve read quite a few posts on the wiki but I admit I''m still very confused by all the possibilities.