Evidence of lack of disclosure

I had an FDR in May 2011 and Decree Absolute two weeks later. The assets were split and he was ordered to pay maintenance. He lost his job in America and simply stopped paying the maintenance two months ago. Then he applied for a variation. He redirected his post and a letter came to my house with his new address. I had no interest in him when I first found out the address. When he stopped paying I had a friend in US get the Deeds of the house (public information in New Jersey). It turns out that the house is in his now new wife''s name, purchased in cash on April 1st 2011. There is no way a secretary''s assistant who only six months before was sharing a flat with her brother had $300K US cash. By the way my ex worked in a very high placed position (major executive). I was at a First Appointment yesterday without a solicitor because I cannot afford one (he came with one) and the judge would not let me ask the question of where the money for the house came from (full disclosure). Apparently it was before the FDR in May 2011. The fact that he lied in May 2011 that he was not cohabitting (obvious from bills and house) seemed to be irrelevant. So does that mean that I should start lying and if I get away with it before certain dates, I will not get punished? I have remortgaged the house to survive and am selling it now. We are going to another FDR in June. He has sent summons to appear in New Jersey court for a restraining order against me. Charges that I am stalking him and the proof is that I found the Deeds (public information) and that his wife has been receiving strange phone calls (I don''t know who she has in her closets but it is not me). I have all of my phone bills as proof. I now have to appear in New Jersey court on April 13th to defend myself in this purely malicious suit (he is barring me from any kind of contact with anyone whatsoever connected with him. I never had any contact with any of those people.
The stress levels are killing me. How am I going to survive this?