Making an offer family agreement.

What do I offer the wife who won''t move out the family home or pay towards the mortgage.

I''ve been paying full mortgage for the last few months and no child maintaince as the mortgage was around £600 mark and child maintaince under CSA guidelines is about £300 for two children. So I''ve tried to come up with some offers for the wife to help me get a place of my own instead of living with parents until the youngest leaves sixth form in 6years.

I offered the wife £300 plus I pay half the mortgage but we would have a sign document saying I was paying child maintaince ( don''t have anything signed yet only bank statements to prove I''ve been paying mortgage) .

She is happy with this as she can stay there for six years but I still can''t afford a place of my own.


I offered her £480 month which would be £300 CM and £180 towards mortgage meant if she used this to help pay the mortgage she would only have to add £120 to it a month. But she says she can''t afford to. She get over 900 benefits 400 from her business legit and 400-500 non-legit (self employed tax fiddle).


now that''s more then I get a month but I''m expected to shell out 38% of my take home pay. To keep her and the two kids in the family home. I''m not allowed in the home because she says it upsets the kids yet she wants me to still pay half because I have to keep a roof over the kids heads.

I think the 480 is a good offer but she says she can''t afford to pay the rest and if that was my final off she won''t pay so we''d get house repossessed.



I can''t afford to pay the £600 pounds yet she refuses to budge I don''t know what to do or which way to turn now.

Any advice would be good. She can''t buy me out or anything and I don''t want to sit six years waiting for her to sell if that''s what I can make her do when the kids have left college.


Forgot to add mortgage I''d about 98 k


House is worth £145k

Bump

Have you started divorce proceedings? You could suggest mediation but if that does not work you would have to go through the courts for settlement.

To advise you about what may be fair, we need to know more. If you look at the top of the property and mortgages section, there is a post at the top called who gets the house. That explains more and there is a list of questions to answer.

Hadenoughnow

Unpleasant though it may sound if she wont compromise then you can only pay the minimum to force her hand. She probably wont want to compromise while it means less for her!

Have you contacted your lender to seek a reduced payment or payment holiday.

Best make sure you have no involvement in the tax fiddle part of her income as well if as you say its non-legit as that could bite!

hadenoughnow wrote:

Have you started divorce proceedings? You could suggest mediation but if that does not work you would have to go through the courts for settlement.

To advise you about what may be fair, we need to know more. If you look at the top of the property and mortgages section, there is a post at the top called who gets the house. That explains more and there is a list of questions to answer.

Hadenoughnow

We need to know:

• Ages Me 40. Her 42

• Length of marriage – including any pre marriage cohabitation

Married 14 years lived together 16 years


• Children – ages, genders and arrangements for them – i.e. how many nights with each parent.

Girl 14 boy 11 they don''t stay at all with me as I''m living at parents and can''t afford my own place.

• Incomes – including any tax credits or other benefits

My income £2130 gross hers is £900 (benefits) £400 (legally through books) £400 ( cash in hand) so £1300 legally or £1700ish ( self employed can''t prove) both monthly figures.

• Value of the FMH £130k to £140k

• Outstanding mortgage on FMH £98k


• Pensions (CETV – Cash Equivalent Transfer Value) or projected pension benefits (ie lump sum and annual pension).

My CETV it £55,000 her No Pension

• Value of any other assets in sole or joint names – this may be endowment policies, savings, investments etc or assets such as paintings, cars, jewellery (over £500)

Nothing here.

• Outstanding debts in sole or joint names and when accrued.

12k worth of debt was 40k but paid most of it back on a DMP now All occurred during marriage. Now we split one joint loan of 6k and 6k credit cards only my name but her as second card holder. She won''t pay anything towards 6k so I''ve got 9k of debt she has 3k!!!


I current pay all of mortgage £600 but no child maintenance as that''s only £330 ish a month. I live back at parents as once my bills are paid I have £400 a month to live on.


Divorce not started yet as can''t afford that either. So if anyone has any advice on what I should do then that would be great.

Oh and she still says she can''t afford half the mortgage if I only pay half myself.

And one more last thing my credit rating is shot to pieces already so I don''t need to worry about that either.

Bump

Can anybody suggest anything to help??