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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

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The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

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Should she ask for/ get maintenance?

  • BewilderedBob
  • BewilderedBob's Avatar Posted by
  • Senior Member
  • Senior Member
07 Oct 12 #359681 by BewilderedBob
Topic started by BewilderedBob
Hi all

I have made a monumental decision for the benefit of my children and the STBX (although I hate to admit it) and would like to run it by others to see what they think.
Me and STBX are living in same house with 3 kids and neither of us are in a position to buy the other out so its a stalemate.
House is up for sale but market is slow and wife wants me out but I won''t go and the kids don''t want to leave anyway as they like it where they are etc.
I have been asking for a 50/50 split of equity since the start and midweek contact etc but again, to no avail so presently I am awaiting a court date to get the financial side sorted.
Wife is on the verge of moving out with kids as she can no longer cope with the situation and just wants to get away.
My proposal to her is this...
If she gives me 30k (which is less than 50% anyway) I will sign house over to her so she gets the 4 bed house she wants but more importantly the kids get to stay in their home and I will leave.
I have asked for and agreed to contact which mostly involves alt weekends and holidays but no midweek contact as I originally wanted.
She says for 30k she will not touch my pension either as she knows its a good deal.
Currently i receive tax credits for 2 children and CB for 1 child but I am happy for her to receive CB and tax credits for all 3 if she accepts this situation.
My problem is this...
I will not be able to get a mortgage at present so will have to rent.
Bearing in mind I need a place suitable for my kids to come back to I will barely be able to afford to live!
So if she then gets an income plus tax credits and CB would I be within my rights to ask that I don''t pay maintenance or maybe minimal maintenance?
Don''t get me wrong, I''m happy to pay and want to support my kids but I physically won''t be able to on my wages with no other incomes etc.
And yes...granted I would have 30k in the bank but that''s for when I can get a mortgage to get back on the property ladder otherwise it just becomes a loan from her which I''ll be paying back in maintenance!!

So just to recap, she gets a very good deal and the kids get to stay in their home and I get very little out of it but for the sake of everyone the situation gets sorted without going to court which would just be costly and time consuming and nobody will gain anything.
Does anybody have any thoughts or opinions on this cos I''d really like to hear them. Thanks

  • Justaparent
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  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
07 Oct 12 #359693 by Justaparent
Reply from Justaparent
I wouldn''t agree to this and didn''t.

Do you want to see your children every other weekend?

Stick in there.

  • sexysadie
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  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
07 Oct 12 #359715 by sexysadie
Reply from sexysadie
I''m afraid you can''t sign away the obligation to pay child maintenance. Even if you made an agreement with her that you wouldn''t pay it she could still go to the CSA and you would have to.

You wouldn''t really be paying the £30k back in maintenance - the money is to support your children and she would probably need it to do so.

Trading off more of the house against your pension so the children can stay there is a good idea, though.

Best wishes,

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