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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

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Negotiating own financial settlement

  • BYOU
  • BYOU's Avatar Posted by
  • New Member
  • New Member
10 Aug 20 #513627 by BYOU
Topic started by BYOU
Hi, some guidance please. Sorry this is long winded...

Me and my ex have been negotiating the finances fairly amicably for about 12 months. We haven’t seen a mediator or disclosed to solicitors. My ex said he didn’t want to disclose. Could be suspicious. In short neither of us want the extra expense, I can afford it less than him. These are the facts that the negotiations are based on. My question is simple, does this offer me a fair settlement and secure future?

Married for 16 years together for 28 years
3 children all over 18 years
I am 50 years old so is my ex
I worked on and off, no real career, bringing up the children
On separation I had a part time job, went part time to manage a renovation project on the former matrimonial home while still married.
I now earn £25k in a full time job. Increased hours following separation.
My husband has always had a career he now earns approx £180,000 plus discretionary bonus which can be up to 40% of his salary.
Outstanding Mortgage on FMH £420,000 - equity £200,000
Husband debt - £80k loans for house renovations
My debt - £12k - again loans credit cards relating to renovations
Outstanding mortgage on buy to let flat - £65,000 - equity £35,000.
Total equity asset - £235,000

Husband - pension pot £130,000 dc
Me - pension pot - £6,000 dc

Current offer from husband is:

He keeps his debt I keep mine as listed above.
He keeps the flat and takes responsibility for the mortgage and takes the equity.
He continues to pay the mortgage on the FMH for the next 10 years. That is the remaining term. I can live there and some of our grown up children now live there again!
He pays me £1500 per month until I retire at 67 years.
He pays a lump sum of £30,000 spread over the the next 5 years. This is £6000 each year for 5 years from his bonus.

When the house sells the split is :
65/35 in my favour
Pensions - split 50/50
My small pension stays with me not part of the negotiations.

It’s complicated, I wish it was simpler! It sounds fair but in short, I won’t be able to get a mortgage for my own property so need enough to buy reasonable size house cash and enough for an annuity. Without disclosure and advice I don’t know if it really is.

My solicitor said she won’t advise me on this because she needs his full disclosure. Is that common practice or will some solicitors give advice on the info I can provide?


  • solvethis84
  • solvethis84's Avatar
  • Senior Member
  • Senior Member
10 Aug 20 #513630 by solvethis84
Reply from solvethis84
I've experienced solicitors giving advice without full disclosure, they made me sign a waiver.

With a salary that high, are you 100% sure there are no other assets, savings accounts, shares etc?

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