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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


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Army Pension - minefield !!

  • Ajatuk
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28 Sep 12 #358300 by Ajatuk
Topic started by Ajatuk
Hi wondered if anyone could help.. My husband and I married in 2005, he left me in April 2012. We have 1 daughter (3) together & I have two children from previous relationship as does he and an ex wife.

He left army last week after 22yrs and his gratuity lump sum is £56k and monthly pension £700. His first wife didn''t want any of this as we took on & paid off marital debt. My question is, how much of this am I entitled to (lump sum & pension) as I gave up teaching career to move every two years to support his career. Didn''t want out of the marriage and would still like to try again but he isn''t interested.
Thanks in advance

  • honeybeeee
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29 Sep 12 #358512 by honeybeeee
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Hi Ajatuk,
I''m in similar position to you.

All depends apparently on if you work now & your salary. We married in 1982.
I to gave up a career to support him, & be a F/T Mum to our 2 children.

I have been told that coz I only work P/T on minimal wage, I am entitled to 50 % of his Pension.
Problem is that if you wanted your share at 55yrs old you would only recieve 50% of that 50% if you know what I mean.
That is because the Pension Co. expected not to have to pay any thing to you til you are 65yrs old.Coz there paying out so much sooner, that is why you recieve a smaller Pension.
BUT his Pension Payments will still be reduced by 50%. That drove me mad....
I''m very new to this Divorce caper. I to did not want it.Even now there is still a part of me hoping that he will change mind.HOWEVER that depends on how deep I bury my head in the sand....
AND
in true Military Fashion do as I''m told.
"Yes Sir, NO Sir, How high do you want me to jump Sir?"

How long has your situation been going on for now? Mine for only a few weeks. HUH it feels like for ever....

Send me a Private Message tomorrow, & I will look up the Military Forces Pension Peoples address for you.

Well believe it or not, tonight I feel that tired nay exhausted that Imight try to go to bed for a while.

Hopefully speak to you soon.

The marvelous thing with this site,is that every body are so lovely & supportive.
Even when I rant & go on & on....

Good Night
x
Only seen my Sol. once,next appt. is Tues.

She told me that she would be prepared to fight to get me Spousal MAINTNENCE.S he thinks I have a v. good chance of getting it as well.
BUT
the very title of it makes me cringe, as if I''m begging to take all his money.
She also said that there was a good chance of me getting 60/40% of house sale....

Hubby has been adviced, that rather than a Clean Break/DIVORCE we should just legally Seperate, & draw up a Financial Agreement (checked by both Sol.)
That way he could pay me the whole 50% on a monthly basis.
SOUNDS fine but what are the chances that couple of yrs down line he has a change of heart.....

We both said that we should keep it amicable, so as not to invive Sols. to much & increase the costs...

The smashing peeps (I think is the word they use here) have warned me that it might not turn out to be so amicable, if I ask for more from him...

Where did you both settlewhen you left Army? We moved miles away from our last Posting. WELL away from both sets of Family as well.
We''ve been here just over 4yrs. Bought this gorgeous house, that needad some work doing on it,but not a huge amount.

I wanted a place of my own, that after 30yrs of married life(largely living in M.Q)We could put our on stamp on it.

Coz as you know, its marvellous when Standing Orders come out, & we are told you could paint the interior ANY COLOUR YOU WANTED as long as it was MAGNOLIA!!!!!!

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29 Sep 12 #358514 by honeybeeee
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Me again. I''ve just read through my Post to you.Clever me. Don''t know how I managed it, BUT some how or other, the message has come out a bit MIXED UP! I really must be tired....
& thats an exuse for me being crap on a computer!!!! Well, OK yes it is......

  • Serendipity100
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30 Sep 12 #358531 by Serendipity100
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Honeybee - a few suggestions to help: if you have your own legal rep, why not listen to him/her rahter than what your stbx''s sol has told HIM? No point in a sep agreement unless you intend to have it drawn up as a Consent Order that judge then makes into Court Order.. You will also need to attend a MIAM should you proceed to formal court AR proceedings. Voluntary negotiation is key. Re Pension - not too sure what you mean about the 50%. Its not a realisable asset if not in draw down as in capitalised - you can not live on the 50% of his pension! You also have children - are they still of dependent age? If so, highly likely the court will allow you the MH.

Appreciate you do not want the divorce, and still a bit shell-shocked - do not be afraid of the terms, such as SM. Don''t you think you are entitled to it after such a long marriage spent building up his career? I would listen to the advice of your own sol in this matter, not to husband. Sorry if this sounds a bit hard, but hope this helps.

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