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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

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Urgent advice about house needed

  • Ladybelle
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27 Jan 08 #12093 by Ladybelle
Topic started by Ladybelle
I'm not sure which thread to put this in seeing as it's all changed today !! so if this is wrong I'm sorry, I'm just in a state here and need some urgent advice.

I've said before husband walked out in October, moved in with his fancy piece in a very posh block of flats. He had been paying mortgage and some utilities. He now has sent this email stating he will no longer pay these after March as he has his own bills to pay and his bills are mounting UNTIL THE EQUITY IS RELEASED FROM THE HOUSE .......

Firstly, when he left he led me to believe he would pay all that for maybe 2 years .... (taken with a pinch of salt)
Secondly - I dont want to lose my house, I had wanted him to be forced to pay SM to me for the remainder of the mortgage !! Clearly he wont ever agree to that on mediation, so it would go to Court, and a Judge may make us sell the house anyway.

But the criteria will come into play, long marriage 25 years, 2 children, his income far outweighs mine, the standard of living before the split, and I am disabled and unable to work more than a few hours a week. So could possibly a judge order him to pay ??

But the other thing is - I am not sure what if any research he has done about a divorce or pension rights etc. I have mentioned before he has a very good civil service pension of 29 years (he is still only 46), someone estimated for me that was worth in the region of £300,000 on paper. The equity in the house is only about 70k. As far as I understand it, it all goes into a pot ? and a judge will decide the division of assets ??
Could the pension outweigh any of his entitlement to the house equity, as I do not want to lose it, as I cannot afford to rent, but equally I cannot afford to pay the mortgage unless he is forced to pay SM.

SO many questions I am firing here, I am sorry.

I still have two children living at home, 22 and 17 so they wont really take them into account, but fact is they still live here and will need to be housed !!

If I lose the house, and get some equity myself, it isnt enough for me to buy, I would never get a mortgage with my small salary, and I also would lose any benefits because I then would have money in the bank if I rented.
What am I going to do ??

  • Ladybelle
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27 Jan 08 #12094 by Ladybelle
Reply from Ladybelle
I meant to add, that I will go and get some more advice from a sol, with a free half hour, but also, do you think it might be worth me filing for divorce myself now on his adultery.
If I am going to lose this house anyway I'd just as soon get it over with. Would I be in a better position if I filed now myself, or is it better for me to wait until he does, but I resent just waiting here for him to decide what to do.

Also reading my first post back, he is going to pay the mortgage still, but not the other bills.

  • Monitor441
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27 Jan 08 #12099 by Monitor441
Reply from Monitor441

Go and get you free half hour from a sol who will give you lots of advice about the way forward and what you can claim from ex2b including anciliary relief.

In the mean time, talk to CAB about the benefits you are entitled to. Are your 17 and 22 year old in education? If so you may be able to get a single adult discount on council tax. Talk to council tax office.

I'm sorry your ex2b is being such a sh*t.

Good luck


  • Ladybelle
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28 Jan 08 #12120 by Ladybelle
Reply from Ladybelle
I've already done all that, I have just started receiving benefits now based on my disablity, and have another question about that. Does benefits count for income for legal aid though ? That worries me.
Also I dont get council tax discount, son actually works for the council. Neither are in education. Both work and do contribute, but all our incomes combined plus my benefits I am still £600 a month short which is what he had agreed to pay.
I will make an appointment with a sol today and go in a lot calmer than I did 4 months ago when I went in the day after he left me and I was just in shock. I need to prepare a list of questions.

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