family home

my husband has left me and my 2 children to live with a so called friend and i am desperate to sever all ties with him, i want to get his name removed from the mortgage and have offered him the maximum amount the building society will give me. This is approximately 25% of his share of the equity in the house, if i could offer more i would but have no other means to do so. i have also offered an alternative of accepting no payments for the kids. He is not responding to either , i am not in a position to pay solicitors and would like some advice on how i can get him to take one or as a last resort both of my offers. please help i dont want him to force me to sell in the future, i pay for everything now and he contributes to the kids when he works.

Hi,

you can''t severe all ties, you have children.

Post more details of ages incomes etc and someone will help but the priority will be housing children.

If house you are living in is reasonable size for your needs and you can afford to live in it don''t be in a hurry to pay him out. Before you know it HE will want to be off the mortgage.

You also can''t give up the right to CM. Either of you can go to the CSA.

my children are 13 and 14 and they make arrangements with dad to see him when he is around. why would he want to be off the mortgage he has an interest / money in the house which im sure he will make a claim on when the children are older. i work part time on a salary of 215000 a year. i just want to settle things now to ensure he can not make a claim of 50% of the home and force me to sell in the future. he lives with his new partner in her home (which is hundreds of miles from our home)/ works away / and stays at his sisters when he sees the kids. he doesnt need to get a somewhere to live.

Being on the mortgage will probably mean he wont be able to get a mortgage elsewhere. It will be a millstone around his neck.

Just because he was no longer named on the mortgage wouldn''t mean he would no longer have a claim on the house or any other assets

could you suggest how i can resolve this. can i get some legal document ? something like a promise to pay or contract to agree a payment so he cant force me to sell in the future. i have been paying for the mortgage and everything else for the home for the last 14 months and would like to get some type of closure. also can i get a divorce without resolving the financial side.
what would be the best options available to me ?

Which ever way you go about it, you will need to sort out the finances. If you divorce without a Consent Order sorting the finances he could come back at any time to claim his share. A Separation Agreement would only be seen as promise, bit like a pre nup which doesnt have that much legal weight.

Just because you can only afford to release 25% of equity doesnt mean that would be an appropriate amount for him to receive. It will depend on the whole picture.

Do you or ex have any pensions, saving other joint assets??

How much does your ex earn compared to you?

To get this sorted you need to negiotate with your ex and come to an agreement, get a divorce and get a consent order drawn up and lodged at court. Only then can you guarantee that your finances are sorted.

I am in same boat as you, need to find out how to stop him coming after house I am paying for and have been for last 15 years!