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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.


Charge vs Current Asset

  • somuch2know2
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19 Apr 12 #324953 by somuch2know2
Topic started by somuch2know2
Still playing around with figures and my solicitor is hesitant to push for more from the house.

I know that the extra 30K I am asking for will NOT affect my STBX monthly income as she will still be clearing 3K after the mortgage is paid.

The extra 30K WILL affect me though as without it I can not buy and pay of the marital debt plus my current liabilities

My solicitor is hesitant but I am happy to give up my charge on the remaining 185K- as I want the capital now, not in 12 years time, at which point I will not be able to get a mortgage. Plus, I dont want any financial ties to her other than the children.

Opinions?

  • happyagain
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19 Apr 12 #324976 by happyagain
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She will probably try and negotiate you downwards. If you go in with your lowest firgure, you then lose out. Ask for more, she can only say no.
PS - I work full-time, 40+ hours per week in a graduate career, and I don''t even clear 3K per month even before the mortgage is paid! Your ex is in a fortunate position!

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19 Apr 12 #324987 by somuch2know2
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She wants to screw me over. This has nothing to do with needs, and she would love nothing more than for me NOT to be able to buy a house. She told me this at the beginning. I thought she would soften, but she hasnt.

Greed and bitterness.

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19 Apr 12 #325030 by sillywoman
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To be honest, you sound like the bitter one.

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19 Apr 12 #325033 by somuch2know2
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Of course I am angry. Who wouldnt be? I worked hard all my life and have nothing to show for it.

I can only hope for a fair outcome. Once that judgement is given im moving on, and not focusing on it.

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19 Apr 12 #325038 by sillywoman
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And she gave birth to your joint children and worked part time and you must have sanctioned that.

Just because you no longer want to be with her, you shouldnt expect so much and I am really trying to reason with you.

Children cost money, end of, full stop. child maintenance that you are paying will go on stuff the kids need and that includes ferrying them here there are everywhere.

Remember someone must be washing, cooking, ironing helping with homework etc. That person is your wife!

Yes she probably could work more hours and she probably will, but she is probably feeling who the hell do you think you are telling her what to do. And any person would think the same.

As a family, the income coming into the house was enormous, much more than most families.

Looking after a household of 4 and all that involves is bloody hard work and expecting her to work full time as well I would say impossible when she is not used to it.

The two older children will have exams shortly, they need their parent to be refreshed when they need to speak to her, not knackered because she is having to work long hours because you have left her.

Yes, the CM you pay is high, but it will decrease with each child, unless your wife gets somethig put into the Consent Order for it to continue whilst they are at university. I wish I had done that, because afterall kids need a base in holidays etc.

Now, stop being bitter towards her and concentrate on your children and their needs and the future.

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19 Apr 12 #325046 by somuch2know2
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She only started working part-time this year.

I really dont think asking her to work 16 hours is asking too much. Every woman I work with has children and they do far more than 40hrs a week. 16hrs still gives her her benefits and allows her to go back to school

yes the kids need to study but why shouldnt they clean up after themselves, help do laundry, mow the lawn. They are not infants.

I also have household work to do, and unlike my STBX I cant afford a cleaning lady.

yes Kids are expensive, but you said yourself I brought in a hefty income- if most of England can raise their kids on far less, than why cant my STBX. as stated before she has MORE income then when I was home.

C100 is sent but no good that will do if I have to sponge off my girlfriend to save money to buy. I need to think of my needs too.

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