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Moving out temporarily

  • Camille
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24 Apr 12 #326127 by Camille
Topic started by Camille
Hi, i wonder if anyone can help please. My husband and i have led separate lives since early February but still in the same house. We have a 3 year old daughter and its driving me insane as we are constantly arguing. I think we need time apart to see what our true feelings are. If i were to move to my parents, even if just for a couple of weeks could he use that against me.........for leaving the ''family home''?
Many thanks!:(

  • sexysadie
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24 Apr 12 #326137 by sexysadie
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It depends how ruthless he is, but yes, he could. He could make it very hard for you to come back by changing locks (not allowed but many do) and not letting you back in. Also unless you take your daughter too he could say that you have deserted her and if he is really horrible he could tell her that and stop your contact with her. I would try and stick it out if it is safe for you to do so. You need to have a pact to stop arguing, though.

Best wishes,
Sadie

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24 Apr 12 #326168 by cookie2
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Camille wrote:

I think we need time apart to see what our true feelings are.

Hmm, in my experience, time apart doesn''t work. You don''t need time apart to see what your feelings are, you need time together. If that feeling is "OMG I need to get away from this man" then I think you have your answer. Just my 2p worth.

As for whether it could affect a divorce in the future, probably not. The danger would be that while you are away, he changes the locks. What would you do then?

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24 Apr 12 #326335 by Camille
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Thank to both of you. Im not surprised by your answers. Im just concerned also, how long can i claim single tax credit for? Im paying my half, doing my own shopping etc. but surely that can only go on for so long. Just stressing as this is all alien to me. I did ring them to explain and they are fine with it but im stuck in this situation because my husband won''t do anything and wants to keep the house etc. Its driving me insane to be fair!:S

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25 Apr 12 #326445 by cookie2
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Camille wrote:

my husband won''t do anything and wants to keep the house etc.

Well, he will probably get a nasty shock when he comes back to reality. You have a young child together. He is not going to end up with the house.

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25 Apr 12 #326613 by Camille
Reply from Camille
I know thats what i said but he''s happy to plod on like it is.......it''s like mental torture and our daughter is picking up on this! :evil::evil::evil::evil:

  • Bobbinalong
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26 Apr 12 #326627 by Bobbinalong
Reply from Bobbinalong
it comes down to a battle of wits and maybe he is stronger in this one.
I wouldnt worry about moving out, someone will eventually. It will not affect your outcome, dont worry about desertion at all that rubbish.
There are cases on here where the carer has moved out and ended up moving back in when the divorce is further along and becoming settled.
Only you can decide what to do and that will be the best desicion for you.

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