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Husband demanding 11k from me!

  • Yoga84
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29 Apr 12 #327100 by Yoga84
Topic started by Yoga84
Hi all this is my first post and I could really do with some advice please.

I have been separated from my husband since September 2011 after only 9 months of marriage.

The problem I have is kinda complicated but I''ll do my best.

Ages: Both 40
Relationship length: 4 years
Marriage: 9 months
Children: None from this marraige, I have a 10 year old son from a previous relationship who lives with me 50% of the time.
Income: Me £50K, him £48K
Equity in property: £38K
Debt: £25K

When we initially lived together he moved into my rented property, 1year later we bought a property. the property was solely in his name as I have an IVA so could not be seen to have assets and was unable to get a mortgage. He put approx 38K deposit down.

Whilst living together all bills apart from mortgage (On which only interest was being paid at approx £150/mth) and council tax(joint names) were paid by me and were in my name. In addition I transferred between £300-700/mth into my partners account. This was to pay for debts accrued jointly but are solely in his name.

Since separating I have moved into a rented property and he has continued to live in the matrimonial home. We have not contributed to each others living expenses during this time. All other assets were split equally.

My understanding was that we would deduct the debts from the assets and the remaining equity would be split between us (possibly not equally but we would both walk away with a sum?)

However, I have now received a letter from him (not his solicitor) stating that he is willing to give me £5K from the equity in the house but when this is deducted from the debts I OWE HIM £11k (I''m not sure why I owe more of the debt than him)that he is willing for me to pay him monthly at £450 for the two years after my IVA finishes in December this year!

I am now really worried that after struggling for 5 years to pay all my debt off I am going to end up with another 2 years of repayments to him.

Can this be right?? I have yet to see a solicitor as due to my IVA I have very little disposable income so wanted to wait until I really had too.

Please give me some advice as I''m at my wits end!

  • hawaythelads
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29 Apr 12 #327101 by hawaythelads
Reply from hawaythelads
He can ask for the moon on a stick.
Don''t mean he will get that either.
Feck offski is always a great answer I find.
All the best

  • hadenoughnow
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29 Apr 12 #327106 by hadenoughnow
Reply from hadenoughnow
The big question here I suppose is how the debts were accrued. What was the money spent on? Who benefited?

The rule of thumb in a short marriage is that you each take out what you put in. He put in 38k and that is the equity that remains.

So we are left with the debt.

You do not need any money to house yourself so I cannot see how having 5k now would benefit you.

He could spend many thousands on solicitors arguing over the debt. Morally if it is truly joint debt, you should pay half of it .. however you could negotiate him down on the grounds that reaching agreement between you would save legal costs. If he is prepared to hand over 5k in cash now, perhaps you could compromise on a figure of 6k that you need to pay towards the debts? Then you could go for an inexpensive Consent Order (wiki does one).


  • Yoga84
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29 Apr 12 #327108 by Yoga84
Reply from Yoga84
Thank you for the advice but just to clarify...

He''s not giving me anything in cash, he''s deducting that £5k from the 16K he says I owe him, leaving a balance of 11k for me to give him.

Some of the debt (12K) was accrued through the large wedding that we had at his insistence, the rest well your guess is as good as mine as he never shared the finances with me. BUT I gave him a large amount of money each month, during our marriage, towards paying those debts off and this does not appear to have happened at all!

I don''t want money from him but equally I dont want to end up in debt again.

  • Yoga84
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29 Apr 12 #327111 by Yoga84
Reply from Yoga84

I know he doesn''t have to get what he asks for and I''m kinds suspicious that the letter has come fro him and not his solicitor as I know he has being seeing one regularly as I have had several letters! He has also written "without prejudice" all over the letter.

But I don''t want to send a counter offer without knowing where I stand and that my offer is reasonable... unlike his!

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