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Stressful start to holidays!

  • mightyredmen
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04 Aug 12 #347335 by mightyredmen
Topic started by mightyredmen
Haven''t been on this site for a long time and didn''t think I would need to post again but this weekend ex has surpassed herself.

As some might be aware I had my final hearing in March. The court order stated that ex had to transfer property into her name by 6th June. So far she hasn''t done that but has simply put the house up for sale. As she only communicates with me through the kids , my youngest brought around to me some conveyancing docs re house fittings etc and said can you sign them for mummy. This was last week. As the court order hasn''t been acted upon I had intended to ask my solicitor about signing these documents as am unsure where they leave me legally.

My contact time with my girls was supposed to start today for the next two weeks and have booked a holiday away with them from next Thursday to Lanazarote . Last evening I had a note shoved through my letterbox from ex stating that if I didn''t sign documents the girls couldn''t come to me today or on holiday with me and I would have to cancel.

This morning my eldest turned up asking for the document signed otherwise she couldn''t come today or on holiday next week. Ex was waiting outside in her car. I told her I hadn''t signed them. Next minute ex jumped out of car and said she wanted them signed or girls are not coming, if full earshot of them.

All this afternoon I have had eldest in tears around my house saying she wants to come and come on holiday. She said it was ex bf who suggested punishment. She has stayed all afternoon and is reluctant to go home.

I''m not being blackmailed though. I intend to speak to my solicitor on Monday re court order and sale of the FMH . As I haven''t a contact order I place I expect he will suggest one. Doesn''t help in the short term though.

Don''t know why she would punish her kids just to get at me :(

On top of that I visited churchyard today to look for plots for final resting place of my Dad :(

  • hapus
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04 Aug 12 #347346 by hapus
Reply from hapus
Hi there
I think its despicable behaviour to use the kids in that way....so unfair on them!
stick to your guns...the kids are probably giving her a really hard time about it...lets hope its just empty threats
good luck

  • rubytuesday
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04 Aug 12 #347347 by rubytuesday
Reply from rubytuesday

Don''t know why she would punish her kids just to get at me

Because she''s a complete moo-bag,that''s why :(

I think you are being wise to not sign the paperwork until after you have spoken to your solicitor - or received advice from those on here who would know the ins and outs of doing so.

As for the holiday - she has admitted to being fully prepared to block contact and deprive the children of a holiday with you out of pure spite - I would suggest you seek a Specific Issues Order asap in order for you to be legally allowed to take the girls away. A holiday like this can only be beneficial for them, for her to maliciously prevent it beggars belief.

  • Bobbinalong
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04 Aug 12 #347348 by Bobbinalong
Reply from Bobbinalong
popilov, read your post mate, know your story in part.
This is so sad.
But, stick to your guns, get a message to your ex that you need to speak to your roll before signing anything. Its hard and people that use kids like this should be the ones denied access! ok doesn''t happen, maybe they should just be shot...
Your doing the right thing, and the kids will remember situations like this, if you have to say anything just say you don''t fully understand them and need help from someone behind a big wooden desk with leather inserts to help.

Its one of those damned if you do and damned if you don''t situations.
If the bf has this much influence, I am sure he will be respected and liked long term for this! not your problem.

I guess I just wanted to reply mate, nothing I can advice other than your right, don''t be blackmailed, you need advice before singing, however, why is she so desperate you do sign? ask yourself that.
Generally there is a reason behind why our ex''s behave so ''desperately'' it appears after a break she is being desperate.
Its so bad on the kids, in this they should not be involved, it doesn''t do them any good in later life.

all the best mate

  • perin123
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04 Aug 12 #347362 by perin123
Reply from perin123
1 word....


Hope you get your holiday with your children xxxx

  • hawaythelads
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05 Aug 12 #347377 by hawaythelads
Reply from hawaythelads
She must have a buyer that''s when the fixtures and fittings list gets drawn up.
Of course she''s in the ex harridan club so she won''t want to tell you that especially as it could also involve her moving away.
Personally I''d sign the shxt one step closer to getting her out of my life altogether.
All the best
Pete xx

  • sun flower
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05 Aug 12 #347380 by sun flower
Reply from sun flower
popoliv. Speak to your solicitor - I think you are right. Make it clear to your children that there is nothing more you want to do than take them on holiday - but you cannot be coerced. Can you also make it clear that communication can no longer be through your children. This is intolerable. Let us know if you get away. sc

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