My wife and I have agreed to go our separate ways. I cannot leave our family home because it is provided by my employer, and we have no other property. So my wife is looking for rented accommodation nearby but seems to be in no hurry to complete this. Is there anything I can do to speed up the process?
Well you could threaten to beat her up or agree to give her all your savings!
I think the best thing to do is get an agreement for financial settlement as amicably but sensibly as possible (having just read your other post) and the Petition for divorce and push on with the Absolute.
Staying amicable is always best as you well know but once your Absolute is through she will obviously have to move.
Thanks (again!)- I know you''re right. And I was coping pretty well for the last couple of weeks but currently feeling a bit frantic. Not helpled by her going out/staying out without letting me know or telling me where she is. And why should she?! Except that it feels like a decent, respectful thing to do while we''re still living under the same roof. But when I''m agonising about affording us going our separate ways and making sure the kids are OK then see her going out glammed up and picked up by a shiny red Ferrari I start feeling a bit sore!
Not sure it''s a boy/girl thing - my wife has always been wowed by glam/wealth etc. I''m rather more down-to-earth. Does raise the question of why we ended up together and managed to stick it out for 20 years!!
Well the Red Porsche did belong to my best friend so agree with you on the being wooed by status - men and woman alike.
Thing was that ex used to get to drive her car and I can''t help it I do find that funny - her car not HIS car.
She changed it after a while and now he drives her silver Range Rover.
Still shouldn''t laugh really - bitchy I suppose because they are in love proven by the fact that they are now married.
She managed a three year marriage to her previous husband - walked into the marriage with lots of debts and walked out of the marriage with half his business and all of his house
I don''t know why I find all of this so funny - well perhaps I do - I know it is a tragedy in the making and so distressing for so many - 4 years of waiting for it to be over for me - I am just waiting for some good old Ancillary Relief and fortunately for me now it is called financial remedy as I think that the court recognises that abuse in divorce is no different from abuse in any other branch of law.
Still doesn''t stop spouses behaving like lunatics and children and showing their true colours (which as you say you have known about for years) at the point of divorce.
Welcome to the truly unbelievably weird world of wiki.
The website was a good find for me. Certainly reassures to read about people struggling with similar to me, if not FAR worse. Logged on this morning because I was feeling low and now feel more positive. Have to say, I feel a bit feeble for not being stronger through this, like some friends who have gone through divorce. But I guess we''re all different and every situation is different. Sounds like you are managing to maintain your sense of humour throughout what you''re going through. I''ll try to follow your example!