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Children/ Contact

  • 007 Heaven
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03 Apr 12 #321443 by 007 Heaven
Topic started by 007 Heaven
When me an my ex wife divorced about three years ago. She assumed contol over our children with the attidude of if you want them more take me to court. I really didnt want to take this route but eventually I had no choice. I pleaded with her to be reasonable and that we could come an arrangment so we could have more or less equal time with them. But she wanted me to only have them weekend and a couple of evening only in the week. Bear in mind we only live a couple of miles away from ewach other.
When i did take her to court to resolve these issues. She the accused my father of sexually abusing my daughter of 5 at the time. Obvioulsy both of my parents were distrought over such an allegation which really divied the faimilies. Agin my ex knowing my parents for 15 or so years this was just unthikabl.
Childrens schools an families were involved with the case. And conducted interviews with both families

It concluded with a report that clearly stated that nothing happened with my father and my daughter nor anyone else and that my ex wife was playing games through the children and had emotional issues from her past with her parents behaviours.

I aloo belive that bt bringing in this accusation this was a means to enhance her financial claims with the unfinished matrimonial finances.

This really has had an effect certainly on the families. My son often saying that he was upset when his grandad got told off and my dughte falling behind in her schooling whilst being examined and investaged.

What just can be brough against my ex wife with such behaviours?

  • somuch2know2
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03 Apr 12 #321444 by somuch2know2
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Speechless... what an ordeal.
I would think you could fight for full custody after that little game of hers. I recall a high-profile case similar a few years back where the mother accused the fatehr and he was finally cleared years later.

  • 007 Heaven
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10 Apr 12 #322836 by 007 Heaven
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I have let things settle with the hope that things improve with her.Before the case was opened I was being restricted to every other weekedn to Friday to Sunday evening and two evening a week. with holidays when it suited her. Hence the allegations to make thisng hard to retrieve in court.
When it was revealed in the social servives report that she was playing games. I was awarded shared residence, with the children staying with me 6 out of fourteen nights. Which i think is woking out well and the kids are happy with the routine also.
However, she is continuing to play games when i need to swap a day for a work commitment for instance.
My son has also mentioned to me that I am being talked bad of with him in earshot he is 11 years of age.
The events that have ocured scince the split have In my opinion put my daughter behind in her school work. And both are being put behind with thier social behaviours.
She is also restricting them to talk to them when she is with her to thier bedrooms(is this normal behaviour)?
She has had four relashionships since our divorce, these have been entered in to my childrens lives.

Do you think I have good grounds for full residence and Main Carer?

Take a look at the enclosed Diary of events.I keep a daily log if anything is worth recording.Some of these date back but some of the overall behaviour reamins similar and at times is worse.

  • Bobbinalong
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10 Apr 12 #322837 by Bobbinalong
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terrible circumstances and can only say one thing really, you can''t change people, especially faults which are deep rooted.....
Do what you think you need to do for your kids

  • Fiona
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10 Apr 12 #322846 by Fiona
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Has the school indicated any concerns recently? It isn''t at all uncommon for children to fall behind at school when their parents separate and then recover lost ground in the longer term. It''s an uphill struggle changing the status quo unless there is evidence from independent professionals (teachers, social workers etc) that a child isn''t surviving satisfactorily.

  • Confused67
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22 May 12 #332259 by Confused67
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I would certainly go for full custody.
although mother''s are supposed to be the protectors, experience has shown us that some times this is not the case and if you have so strong evidence that your children''s psyche is being tampered in such an awful way, then it is obvious that staying with their mother will make more harm than good.

Think for yourself how will they be when they grow up and in these surroundings?

All my sympathy to you and my thoughts to your children. This is a TERRIBLE situation to find yourself in. It breaks my heart only reading this.

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