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some advice needed on my rights

  • gullibleK
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23 May 2016 18:02 #478695 by gullibleK
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at 3am thursday morning my life and that of my 2 kids changed for ever. just having arrived back from Spain my partner of 14yrs declared he no longer loved me. But swore there was no one else. I didnt see it comming and still cant get my head around it. For a while things had gone stale, not much communication etc, i suspected he had strayed but had no proof. last few months he has been real sneaky. Taking his mobile to the shower oilet and placing it under his pillow at night. well its all come to a head. friday night he said he would go to a motel to give me space but on the saturday i snooped. Friday evening he spent the night with a girl (24) him(38) me (42)..i read messages on my laptop after logging into his messenger.. i confronted him and he denied it so i punched him. Now we are on monday and the dirty ***** has been at it with numourous girls since last year and that was only confirmed because one of them decided to tell me. In total i know of 8. Anyway he told me he wants me out. His name is on mortgage but ive paid bills etc for 14yrs ...am i entitled to something? ive a lawyer tomorrow. He is refusing to move out until i find a place but i cant live here under the same roof . im trying to keep calm for the sake of the kids but im losing the plot.. im currently on injections to put me through a menapause to help with endometriosis and due a second op soon so health wise my hormones are all over the place..any advice would be greatly recieved :(

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23 May 2016 19:12 #478699 by Trolly Dolly
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Hi There
I''m so sorry you''ve found yourself in this terrible situation. You must be devastated. You''ve come to the right place. We''ve all been through the mill to various degrees so you''ll get good advice here. I''m glad you''ve got yourself a solicitor. They will hopefully be able to give you some initial advice about what your options are and how you should proceed. Obviously to answer your question then yes you are entitled to ''something'' but that very much depends on the assets you both have, income, pensions, number of children etc. Unfortunately the law has very wide discretion with how it divides up the marital pot. Could you maybe give some more details and the wiki members might be able to give you their opinion. Although you must remember it is just an opinion but having people who understand can be comforting.

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23 May 2016 19:59 #478702 by Mitchum
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Hello and welcome to wikivorce.

I''m very sorry to read of the situation you and the children are in. It is very significant that you refer to your partner and not your husband. This could make a big difference to the advice wikis might give.

However, one thing you should do without delay is to register your interest in the family home with the Land Registry. That may stop your partner from selling your home quickly and give you thinking time to plan the best way forward for you and the children.

Has he given you any indication of how he thinks the children are to be provided for? The priority is a roof over their heads.

I hope you have family and friends at home to support you now and you will certainly get support and guidance here.

It''s a huge shock to find the person you trusted never to hurt you in this way has abused your trust, so you must take good care of yourself. Spend time checking up on your rights and how you can look after the children.

Best wishes

Mitchum

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24 May 2016 16:58 #478747 by gullibleK
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thanks for the reply. Basically we didn''t marry,engaged yes.. I was already with him 2yrs when he bought this house. He payed the mortgage and I pay phone bill,sky, electric and pay the shopping. I also pay for my kids bus to school and their meals at school.

I have the lawyers again on Thursday. I have found a rented place but have made no decisions yet. my partner or should I say ex keeps saying I''m entitled to nothing but his face dropped when I told him I knew my rights and if he has contacted his lawyer like he keeps saying he has then he will know for sure what my rights are... I also stated if kids don''t want to move then neither the hell do I and I can stay there until they are 18yrs. He has since offered me money for a deposit and first month rent... I think he is scared incase I persue compensation of some sort... but I do know I cant stay in same house...i''d cut him up :angry:

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24 May 2016 17:01 #478748 by gullibleK
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hi... He has no intention of selling. he still has 10yrs of a mortgage. I know he wants it for the kids future which is fine by me... he wants me out but cant force me out.. need be I can stay there until my kids are 18..another 9 yrs... the thought of me getting some kind of reward or compensation is what he doesn''t want...im havnt said to him my intentions. but if I move can I still claim ?? ive submitted banks statements etc to lawyer to prove I payed utility bills etc

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