Can anyone tell me what the best solution is between the two. I know my stbx wants to get his own house etc., and I have been doubtful all along about mediation which we both attended separately last year.
I have now appointed a solicitor who specialises in finances and is suggesting collaborative law which I think may be the best way forward for me.
I''m not sure, but I can be certain of one thing. That is, that unless both parties are willing to engage with the process, it won''t work.
Collaborative law ( CL ) is where the parties'' solicitors actively try and reach the best settlement for both parties. It should in theory be less confrontational and you should have the pros and cons explained to you before you embark on the process.
The main thing you need to know is that, if the process does not result in an agreement and it becomes necessary to go to Court, both solicitors must withdraw and both of you would have to appoint new solicitors.
There is therefore a built in incentive for the solicitors to reach agreement and this may not be a bad thing, but there is always the fear that one or other of them will try and lean on the client a little in an effort to resolve the matter.