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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

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What do I need to take with me?

  • planecrazy
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28 Apr 09 #111525 by planecrazy
Topic started by planecrazy
Hi, I have an appointment with a mediator on Wednesday 6th May.
Can anyone tell me what I need to take with me? Do I need proof of things, or do I just need to write things down.
I need to know exactly what, is it all things like earnings, mortgage, bills, savings, pension.
God I dont know where to stat first. Im so worried.
Thanks for your help.

  • Happy Days
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29 Apr 09 #111711 by Happy Days
Reply from Happy Days
is it your first appointment?...if so you have nothing to worry about normally they will just tell you how the process works etc.if its your 1st appointment with your STBX in the room just be calm and focused,it would help if you have a rough idea of your financial situation,but again its not crucial at this stage.im on my 5th and final session today and fingers crossed it has been a good experience.

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29 Apr 09 #111749 by planecrazy
Reply from planecrazy
Hi, thanks for the reply.
Yes it's my first one, and im going alone. I wasnt aware he could come to my session anyway.
I just found out it is the solicitor that I saw a few weeks ago to get a bit of legal advice. I didnt know a mediator was also the solicitor???
Will this be expensive? I can see this running on a while as my Husband is being awkward about everything.

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09 May 09 #114863 by planecrazy
Reply from planecrazy
Well I went to what I thought was my first mediationm,turns
out it was just the solicitor that I had seen a few weeks earlier
for advice. She said she could deal with it all through her, but I
guess this would be more costly, so asked to be referred to a
mediator. Im not happy, as this has wasted over a week and I
really wanted to get this moving. I have a deposit on a house
that is due for completion, and ive not been able to apply
for a mortgage on it due to my Husbands solicitor telling him
to hold back.
She said it could be another 2 weeks before I get an appointment.
I went Wednesday, its now Saturday and she still hasnt called
with an appointment at least. Is this usual practice?

  • rasher
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09 May 09 #114879 by rasher
Reply from rasher
You dont need to leave mediation in the hands of your current solicitor - google mediation in your area and try to find a family mediation servce www.nfm.org.uk. You do end up waitinf a few weeks for an appt unless there is a cancellation. I would have to say its a waste of time going on yr own - read up on the site find out what mediation is about and get yr husband to the first appointment so you can get things rolling. I presume he is agreeable to mediation?

If his sol is advising him not to agree to things that will be in relation to the divorce presumably in which case you arent going to be able to move it very quickly. Is there anyway he will agree in advance so you can get yr mortgage?

  • markp
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09 May 09 #114945 by markp
Reply from markp
hi just started my mediation for second time, stbx called it off last year, my solicitor made referral to family mediation service i then received an appointment by letter direct from them for first appointment to be attended alone, in with the letter was a form to be filled in and information as to what i had to take as proof with me, the first meeting is to see if you have to pay and if so how much, the mediator explains how it works and checks details about marriage eg. how long, if children are involved, what is to be divided- house, insurance policies and pensions etc,
then you will be asked if you wish to proceed with mediation , if so a further appointment will be made for you and your stbx to attend.
markp

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