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how do you find a financial mediator

  • Dadsrus
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30 May 08 #24090 by Dadsrus
Topic started by Dadsrus

My wife and I are looking at separation, which we both want and have been advised to use a financial mediator to help us through.

What does such a person look like and where would you find someone who could act in this way.

I would be delighted to have a second opinion on what is reasonable (I can't see the wood for the trees right now)

  • mike62
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30 May 08 #24092 by mike62
Reply from mike62
Little steps at the moment DasRus - take it easy on yourself - you are very raw right now, and although you want to deal with it all RIGHT NOW, it is sometimes better to let the emotions subside a little. Your vision is clearer.

Mediators are often solicitors or paralegals who work with clients to achieve an agreement on how the finances will be separated and on contact arrangements for the children.

Your local Relate marriage guidance service can probably point you in the right direction.

If you are looking at a solicitor, look for a member of Resolution - they take a collaborative approach to family law, instead of an adversarial one.

The best piece of advice I can give you is to try to keep things amicable with your wife. As soon as solicitors become the communication medium, the cost soar through the roof. Better to keep that money in the family po for division than to pay for a nice holiday for your solicitor.

Best of luck and keep posting


  • Dadsrus
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30 May 08 #24099 by Dadsrus
Reply from Dadsrus
Thanks Mike,

I never like using solicitors for open ended tasks - they just eat money and are often not close enough to the task in hand to be effective.

I know; lots of generalisations that are completely unjustified I'm sure. I can see I just have to be brave and tough it out.


  • Hants Family Mediation
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03 Jun 08 #24509 by Hants Family Mediation
Reply from Hants Family Mediation

Useful info from Mike, but there are also mediators who are not allied to particular solicitor firms (as either solicitors or paralegals) and are specialist mediators. Don't want to sound trite, but look them up in the phone book/Yellow Pages, or try Google.

If you want a not-for-profit service, have a look at the website of National Family mediation (www.nfm.org.uk) where you will be able to find the one nearest you. [We are members of that org, in case there is any doubt - but no idea where you are so this is not promoting our organisation.] These services will be able to help with financial matters - and will refer you for legal advice separately when this becomes necessary. Generally much cheaper than doing it all through solicitors.

You can also look on the Legal Services Commission webiste for any mediation service in your area that does publicly funded (Legal Aid) work. The category is Family Mediation, which includes finance and children issues.

Best of luck.

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