A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info


What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.


arghhhhhhh

  • soobee
  • soobee's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
More
20 Sep 11 #288726 by soobee
Topic started by soobee
hi stbx cancelled mediation over 3 weeks ago coz he couldnt be bothered to get info needed for mediator....just phoned them to see if they have been chasing him up..which they have ..they phoned him on the 15th..only for him to say he really needed to talk to me 1st....have i heard from him nope....me ,mediator and solicitor think hes stalling.....mediator phoning him now as i write this and gona follow up with letter..saying if he doesnt book another appt by nxt tues then they will forward my legal aid forms to my solicitor....which in some ways would be better for me as it gives her more power to get all info we need for settlement.....but i have tried to be amicable and thought mediation nicer way of doing things....but seeing as hes not the one whos broke...i suppose theres no rush for him...????:angry::(

  • Brit
  • Brit's Avatar
  • Premium Member
  • Premium Member
More
21 Sep 11 #288878 by Brit
Reply from Brit
Hi Soobee, it does sound like he is stalling doesn't it. The only way that my ex and I can communicate is via email, even then it can be very tense at times, being so careful not to write the wrong things to upset each other.
I expect to some extent he is very scared of the outcome of the mediation meetings, as he will feel he hasn't total control of his finances.
In my case I received two letters from our mediation dept, saying that they had been trying to ring me but were unsuccessful and yet I didn't receive one single call, voicemail message or anything ! This made it look as though I was ignoring mediation when I wasn't. Maybe your mediator isn't as insistant as they make out, maybe not ?

I've just read a mail from my ex asking me to bring copies of my pension details and share details with me to the meeting on Friday, this is our first assessment meeting and she is telling me what to do already ! I can see it being a very jolly affair indeed :(

I do hope that you get some movement with your situation soon, sitting around waiting for a response can be very stressful.

  • soobee
  • soobee's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
More
21 Sep 11 #288889 by soobee
Reply from soobee
hi brit...i didnt have to take anything to 1st joint meeting was meant to take it to 2nd meeting ..but as you can see thats been postponed until futher notice....i know mediation has been in contact as they have to forward everything to my solicitor.....just getting fed up with the whole saga.....good luck for fri will be thinking of you ...let me know how it goes ...u can always inbox me????

  • Brit
  • Brit's Avatar
  • Premium Member
  • Premium Member
More
21 Sep 11 #288893 by Brit
Reply from Brit
It looks like the first meeting scared him off then ? Keeping the momentum going is damn hard work and it is so disappointing when things like this occurr.

The forms I was sent stated that if the asessment goes well, then the first meeting can take place straight away. I would still rather chat to them about the financial issues first and a few other points, plus I am just about to complete my application for a transfer mortgage to buy her out, which will alter my financial status anyhow.

Yes I will report back after the meeting, I'll inbox you if it's all complicated !!

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11