The guidance notes for form E specifically state that "monies from family members are not to be counted as loans".
My ex tried that one and folded at the point my solicitor (acting on my instruction) pointed that out. Why her solicitor allowed that to go on the form, I've no idea. I don't know WHAT solicitors actually do for their money. I'm the one that had to go through her bank statements and credit cards bills and tie that in with times I knew she was out of the country and cross reference credit card bills showing the purchase of washing machines with the amounts declared as essential outgoings.
As for credit card debts, even if they are in a sole name, making the debt NOT joint and severally liable (both or either can be pursued), they still enter the needs based calculation as the repayments must be met. Excepting if there is a significant debt which has been added after separation - this is akin to disposing of an asset which is another no no.
Asset valuation can be ordered to be done by the court engaging a chartered surveyor and valuer. Costs for this can be attributed.
Yep I had the same where I always had a big question regarding her business and the purchase of the business building. For tax purposes(complicated) it would have been better to incorporate the building into my property portfolio. Nope she preferred to rent it to herself (complicated) but kept building in her name even though it was very disadvantageous tax wise.
Why? It was a classic case of whats mine is mine and whats ours is half mine.
Yep half my house brought into the marriage went. Half my inheritances went.
Now my case would not have been so bad but her business building was bought 15 years previously. Its called forward planning.
This site should be compulsory reading before anyone agrees to get married !!
The good news is karma works in mysterious ways and you can pop down Ladbrooks and put a bet on who is doing better now !!!
That is good news! I do believe in Karma. I know I'll be ok no matter what but I refuse to lie down and let him walk all over me! Thanks for the reply
Very helpful thank you. Out of interest I don't suppose you can point me to the form E guidance notes that contain that phrase? I don't have it in mine? By the way, I'm the original poster but forgot my password and had to set up a new account as my reset password links never arrived!!
I've looked, but though they are in the notes I have from 2009, they are not in the notes now. Instead there seems to be a general acceptance of the fact that family will often loan other family towards the purchase of a house or car. The advice seems to be to add in 'soft loans' to the proceedings to be determined during proceedings. In my case a loan from mum to pay legal costs should have been a gift.
Whose name things are in (debts or assets) largely irrelevant except eg in the case of a very short marriage or enormous wealth that exceeds all needs. The fact is that when you are married, as Polar says, two become one.
My ex, post separation, turned out to have various six figure debts to aquaintances, that he had been hiding from me for years. A friend alerted me to this when she took me to see a lawyer (my head was in the sand) and I actually said to her and the lawyer that she must be mistaken and that we had no debts. I'd been fooled good and proper.
So tho I had no income (SAHM for c20 years) and he was a banker with no interest in his children, his share of the split had to allow him to repay these previously secret debts as my lawyer explained that the court would not force him into bankruptcy and he had also contrived to have no income.
So he takes the money. And readers may not be surprised to learn, though I was: he settled his debts at 30p in the £. And went bankrupt anyway (thus neatly avoiding paying CM).
I would have given anything at the time to persuade my ex to come back, now I think my divorce was expensive but worth it. I'm not suggesting by any means that you let your ex walk over you, and it sounds as though you have your head screwed on. But the courts have seen it all before, and you can't put a price on your freedom.
Really sorry about what happened to you.
My partner really had the same(and it makes me be ashamed to be a woman) when I hear how men are so unfairly treated through the divorce system.
However, I too am hoping for karma to work her lovely magic!!
Happy New Year my friend.