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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

What not to do with solicitors

  • leanng
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16 Aug 12 #350014 by leanng
Reply from leanng

i totally agree with you. I wish i''d found this site a year ago and maybe i would have dealt with it all differently.

i know how my ex ticks so to speak. From trying to be amicable for 18 months, my solicitor has actually now said my ex is a very difficult character to deal with...

Don''t get me wrong, my solicitor did nothing wrong but he didn''t know who he was trying to deal with!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • .Charles
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17 Aug 12 #350045 by .Charles
Reply from .Charles
Sadly it is a common situation where one person is deliberately unreasonable which elongates proceedings and drives up costs. A lawyer cannot do much in this situation as a reasonable approach to proceedings is required from all concerned.

There are various things a lawyer can do to compel another person to cooperate with the legal process but if that person is hell bent upon being disruptive, no amount of penal notices, Directions of the court or whatever will ease the process. The court has the power to commit a party to prison and will do if necessary but what good does that do? And a person who is committed to prison is unlikely to be in a good mood on their release - if they ignored the various warnings and allowed themselves to go to prison, their behaviour will continue.

Your lawyer is employed to speak for you and if you cannot make your ex see sense, your representative will have the same problem.


  • leanng
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17 Aug 12 #350048 by leanng
Reply from leanng
I believe this whole situation will continue. Putting it in Court will have angered him even more.

What is really strange is, all i want is out.

Situation is very simple to resolve. Only talking pensions and equity held on deposit.

He has a new life, new girlfriend, more than enough money to do as he pleases. I have demanded nothing other than a settlement.

I think what upsets him more, is that i am managin on my own with kids. Possibly cannot believe i do not want the comfortable life i had with him. But no amount of money will make up for an abusive partner.

  • Stress3
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18 Aug 12 #350370 by Stress3
Reply from Stress3
I hear what you say but from a client''s point of view it''s lose-lose.

Let''s say a client has doubts about the solicitor''s competency: for example, she contradicts herself, seems to engage in pointless exercises, advice on situation / possible outcome vary from one meeting to another...

According to you, if the client questions the solicitor: he is arrogant, if he ask friends/ go on forum and refers to this: he is patronising, if the client changes solicitor he is volatile.

What would you suggest the client does?

  • leanng
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18 Aug 12 #350373 by leanng
Reply from leanng
i would suggest you do as much research as possible on the internet regarding your particular circumstances. post on here.
i possibly went along with my solicitor cos i wanted to be amicable, keep costs down. with hindsight and knowledge i would have done so much more differently i.e. i would have put the whole thing in court myself at the beginning.
you are the only one that knows what you want. you need to see whether this can be achieved. A solicitor can give you his opinion but at the end of the day, it is your decision. go with your gut feeling!!!

  • futurehope50
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01 Feb 13 #377392 by futurehope50
Reply from futurehope50
I am one of those clients who respond rapidly to my solicitor and provide all the evidence needed. My stbx however has ignored everything, letters meditation and now the courts.
Very Frustrating!!

My solicitor I appreciate has little to go on, but where I get frustrated is when I am not informed of what is going on. When I contact for information I get fobbed off. I understand that it takes time to get back to a client on occasions. I have on one occasion emailed, over about 5 days, rung the office, been told they will ring me back and this continued for well over a week.
A quick response and apology via her secretary would have been useful. But it wasn''t until I cc in the head of family law on an email, did I get a response. This has happened twice.

Also if ahe makes any errors, she turns them around and back dates things (I suspect). ''Oh yes that was sent out yesterday'' for example or ''a problem with the post''

Also she got me to sign the form E and filled it out and sent it to the courts without me seeing it. There were several errors on it, which she tried to blame me about. But this fell flat, as I had provided evidence. again no apology or admittance to this. But did say she wouldn''t charge for the emails regarding this!!

Do I stick with her or change? cant afford to lose money, limited funds.

I note you say that if bankruptcy is likely to let her know. Well I told her that this was threatened months ago. She said we have to hurry to get Consent Order, but with stbx delaying, this is proving difficult.

Is There anything else she could do regarding bankruptcy?

Many thanks

  • calico01
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01 Feb 13 #377426 by calico01
Reply from calico01
Change solicitors! I had problems with mine for the same reasons - it was almost as though she couldn''t be bothered with me as there wasn''t enough to go on. When she finally got back to me a MONTH after I emailed her, I told her where to go. Meet with a few different ones, and find one you like. Most will give you a 30 min free consultation, or ask for a nominal donation to charity. Then you have to transfer the files, but your new solicitor will arrange this. There will be a cost for them to get up to speed with where you are in proceedings, but money well spent.

Good luck - I know how frustrating it is!

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