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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

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The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


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why do solicitors cause trouble

  • Sera
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28 Sep 07 #4099 by Sera
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Will,

Sols don't have a 'magic stranglehold', but to the emotionally raw, naieve peeps, they pretty much act as 'Gods-of-the-law', and we (mere mortals) often work at their suggestion.

My ex's sol is very aggressive in her conduct. My ex has made many desicions (re: counselling etc), but he comes home stating what his sols advice is. It's BEST for our marriage that we find 'closure' through counseling, but it's best for her bank account, to reap £££ from our misery, and it doesn't help her 'conduct case/non-mol' against me, if indeed we are so civil as to mediate, talk and share pots of tea.

What happens behing closed-doors (away from the courts), is an appalling abuse of powers, (not from all sols), but verbal and intimidating legal-mumbo-jumbo that looks (to the faint-hearted) to be very scarey.

(I note that their Royal Blue triangular corners, attached to the top of each piece of paper, bring fear and cause my knees to wobble! How can such a small scrap of paper instill such fear in my 5ft 11" frame)???

Solicitors are very, very scarey. (Apart from you Will!)

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28 Sep 07 #4101 by JLGsDad
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One word of warning. Are you sure you are being told the truth? Is it really a sol who's has said something, or has the ex changed their mind and blamed the sol to get them off the hook?
My wife has quoted her sol so many times when she is making things up (silly woman says one thing then leaves sol's letter lying around that says something very different!) that I have no belief in anything she says.
Your ex may be different, but it is something to bear in mind.

My personal opinion? Sols colour their advice to be nice to their client (human nature) and to get fees. I've just found a very straight-forward, believable and direct sol who impressed me greatly, and her advice agreed with what I'd found on the net. My morale has shot up 200%. :)She's the best of 3 I've spoken to. The other 2 had targets to meet and showed it; she might, but she didn't encourage me down the legal route with nice fees for her partnership.
If my experience is typical, 1 in 3 are good and don't lead you on. Best go to a specialist partnership?

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28 Sep 07 #4107 by Fiona
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I've found generally lawyers take cues from their clients. In our divorce case I remember receiving letters from my ex's solicitor saying how an earth did I expect my ex to manage and my proposals were a cheek but I knew it was all hot air from my ex. Almost 4 years down the line when my ex did finally ask his sols opinion of the same proposal and for advice he was told it was an exceptionally good offer and he should bite my hand off!

Regarding 'verbal and intimidating legal-mumbo-jumbo' as a casual observer that seems to be the nature of the law in England & Wales and I don't think solicitors are to blame. For example here in Scotland the law is quite clear, all parents are obliged to support their children aged 18 to 25 who are in education. In E&W there is no general obligation for parents to support students over 18. However, under the Children Act 1989 if their parents don't live together over 18s in their own right can apply for maintenance from them. That's if there weren't specified orders in respect of the "child" in place immediately before they reached their 16th birthday. If that's not bad enough (and you are still following) in certain circumstances maintenance for over 18s is dealt with under the Matrimonial Causes Act 1973.

  • markp
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28 Sep 07 #4112 by markp
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it may be that my x2b is the one thats at faultby misleading her sol at times with information as there has been a lot of lies about me in the letters from her sol, but i would have thought that her sol would want some proof of the things that are been said as there could come back to bite them. Also her sol is trying to be a bully, i changed my sol recently as i was not happy with my first one, at the time my x2b and her sol was told my old sol was not representing me anymore and before my new sol got in touch with them i received leeters from her making demands and if i did not comply there were threats of what there could do to me, these soon stoped when my new sol came to the fore. Her sol is costantly demanding that we should only talk through sols but mine thinks we should try to talk and sort things between us as it will save us both money, but my x is listening to her sol who has told her she gets legal aid and will not have anything to pay no matter how much she uses her sol.

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28 Sep 07 #4113 by JLGsDad
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Markp,
I'm not on legal aid, so you will need to check what I say.

My understanding is that legal aid is only 'free' in that you don't have to pay up front - the costs have to be paid back at some point, either from any court award or other funds. Some people such as those permanently on benefits might escape with paying back at £2 per week, but in general legal aid has to be repaid.

For a sol, legal aid does not pay well. Some don't do it, some do only a bit and some do lots of hours to make it pay.

Check what I say then, if I'm right, you can speak to your ex - the fact that legal aid isn't free might not have been properly explained. I'm told that behaviour changes can be dramatic!

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28 Sep 07 #4114 by markp
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i believe you are right as i applied for legal aid and was turned down, but if i remember it right, on the form it states that you will be required to repay the legal aid if you get a financial settlement, i tried telling this to my x but she says her sol has told her she will not have to pay anything and she will keep every penny she gets off me, she also accused me of just trying to undermine her sol because i'm frightened.

  • Sera
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29 Sep 07 #4118 by Sera
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...Sols conduct:

In my ex's sworn Affidavit for non-mol/Conduct (to evict me from our MH) Ex has refered to incidents since 2005, (as have his witnesses). Incidents that are not my version of factual events, which I wish to refute in preparation of my defense.

My
ex has severed all my e-mail contact I've had with our friends / our colleagues etc; by password protecting what was our joint e-mail of two years. He has also denied me access to their contact numbers, and removed documents pertaining to this case, and removed both 2005, and 2006 joint desk diaries.

I wrote requesting them from his sol. She says they are not nessecary to the Case, and will not be providing either the contact numbers asked for, the diaries, and questions my need for them?

I believe she's 'obstructing the course of justice'.

Am I right in that line of thinking. I have hundreds of pages to defend, and without the evidence I need, (which in the future will also be needed for the AR disputes)

Sera

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