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advice please

  • zippy
  • zippy's Avatar Posted by
  • Junior Member
  • Junior Member
22 Oct 07 #5082 by zippy
Topic started by zippy
Hi, been lingering for a while and now is time for my first post.

Will try and speak to a solictor at some point this week but if anybody on here has been through something with a similar situation outcome/advice would be appreciated.

First things first I don't really want to use a solicitor but if I have to I will.

Basic information.

Been married 5 years have found out that my wife has told people that she dos'nt love me and should never habe married me, whenever I have asked her if we had any problems it was always no anyway sorry i digress we both work full time I earn £26000 basic pa with possibility of overtime my wife earns £22000 pa, my wife only returned to full time employment in april of this year after staying home to look after our young son who will be 4 in january.

We have a house with a mortgage of about £75000 house's value is about 170,000-175,000. I have a loan in my name of £16000.

Now the main question is I want my son to live with me and ideally buy her out of the MH, I do the majority of things for our son from getting him dressed and give him his breakfast to taking him to the childminder picking him up from childmnder and giving him his tea and putting him to bed. Now I'm pretty sure that when I say this to my x2b she will flip but I have genuine concerns of how she will cope with him 24/7.

Whats my chances???

thanks in advance

  • Fiona
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  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
22 Oct 07 #5086 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
I think it will depend largely on whom historically was the main child carer and which parent your son perceives to be his primary carer. For developmental reasons long absences from the primary attachment figure aren't usually recommended for children of this age.

  • gone1
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  • Platinum Member
22 Oct 07 #5094 by gone1
Reply from gone1
Crosser. Usualy children of this age are better off with there mother. I think your angling toward custody. Beware that this is a very difficult area of divorce and your chances of success are slim. Further this may not be the best thing for your son. Despite what you think. Best way is for you to have joint custody of your son and see how things pan out. Its going to be hard enough for your son to deal with and having a custody battle and the subsequent fall out from that may make life hard for him. Just be a good dad while you have him.

As for the FMH why not buy her out. But its upto her and in divorce the mother and child must be provided for so you may lose out.

Divorce is sh1t and nobody wins. Its all lose. Chris.

  • zippy
  • zippy's Avatar Posted by
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  • Junior Member
22 Oct 07 #5128 by zippy
Reply from zippy
thanks for the replys,

chris that is what I am trying to avoid, I won't push this or drag it on, just been keeping a diary of what I do for him and I kind of do everything for him, if there is no chance of him living with me then I would drop it as like you say it would get messy and I don't want that, I just want a clean as possible break.


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