Applying for Decree Absolute

My partner split with his (soon to be ex) wife in December 2003. Initally things were amicable & they agreed to divorce after two years separation with consent.
However things started turning nasty when I met my partner in July 2004 and in July 2005 the (soon to be ex) wife decided to file for divorce on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour & adultery(!?). She did this on the grounds that it was all too painful, she needed to get divorced as quick as possible in order to get on with her life and couldnt possibly wait a further 5 months & complete 2 years separation to divorce with consent.
Anyway, forms were filled in and they attended mediation which broke down after 3 appointments in October 2005. The ex's need to get on with her life seems to have died a death as it took her until July 2006 to obtain the Decree Nisi and up until now she still hasn't applied for the Decree Absolute despite various letters via solicitors.
The ex now wants to stay married for as long as possible and is extremely reluctant to sort out finances. We are paying 100% of the mortgage & life insurance for the marital home (which equates to approx 40% of my partners net income) as well as rent for our home - their eldest child lives with us full time and the two younger children spend approx 30% of the time with us. So financially it suits the ex to carry on with things as they are?
As she is the petitioner is there anything we can do to force her into completing the paperwork?
Money is extremely tight for us so is there a way of us taking control of the situation without incurring huge solicitor or court fees?
Please help!!

Hi Ambeljazz,

Your situation has similarities to mine. Funny isn't it what the appearance of a new partner can do to divorce proceedings that seemed so cut and dried before?. The whole point of us agreeing to and getting a divorce is that we dont want to be together anymore, thereby being free to be with a new partner. My ex was unbeleiveably slow with any of the financial side of the divorce process, after waiting over 12 months for her voluntary disclosure of finances I unfortunately had to resort to court to get things moving. She is on legal aid so can wait forever and a day if she wants for anything to be finalised which is why I had to go down the court route in an effort to eventually be free of her. This is a costly and bitter process to be in and if you can avoid it then that would be great. We are at FDR (form E was issued which forces the exchange of financial disclosure) in July and although it is costing a bomb and still seems to be taking forever (split in Jan 2006) I am hopeful that it will come to an end sooner rather than later now with the courts involvement.
Good luck