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he wont divorce me

  • sam0811
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05 Dec 07 #8459 by sam0811
Topic started by sam0811
i am seperated from my husband and we both have new partners but he is refusing to divorce me.can i do anything to make this happen.we have 3 children that he no longer has contact with as the woman he is seeing has had her children removed because of physical and mental abuse and there was questions raised about sexual abuse also(she has her convicted peodaphile father visit regually).because of this i stopped all contact with him and he hasnt bothered fighting me for it nor do any of the children want to go but he is saying that to get his own back on me he is never going to divorce me as thats what my new partner and i want

  • madaboutcars
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05 Dec 07 #8465 by madaboutcars
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Hi
Dont really want to state the obvious here, but why dont you divorce him??
You could divorce on the grounds of adultery or unreasonable behaviour. If you have been seperated for over 5 years, you dont need his agreement to divorce. How long have you been seperated?

With regards to the kids, couldnt you arrange something whereby he comes to your place to see the kids? Surely he understands your concerns but then again if its a new relationship, im sure that he is all loved up and the kids are the last thing on his mind:blink:

  • sam0811
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05 Dec 07 #8471 by sam0811
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wasnt sure i can use adultery and unreasonable behaviour has a waiting period if i go for adultery can he stop me in any way.
the kids are definately the last thing on his mind he says she changed and isnt like that anymore me personally im not prepared to take that risk with my kids

  • Specialdad
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05 Dec 07 #8474 by Specialdad
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Apart from counting his money!! Is your sol not advising you on the petition?? Dont sit on your backside and worry, get stuck in and get that petition into court on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour asap and get rid of the guy from your life.

Leopards dont change their spots so dont trust his new woman or the father as far as you can throw them. Personally I would hand all child abusers over to al queda to be beheaded!! Slowly!!

Best of luck hope it goes well B)

  • tigstheterror
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05 Dec 07 #8475 by tigstheterror
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He can counter petition if you divorce for adultery but has he the money to to fight the claim?
If you divorce on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour you can do what i have just done, serve him personally,that way he doesn't sign the acknowledge of return paper and he is classed as served,he isn't able to counter petition on these grounds either.
After waiting almost a year now,my ex was swapping addresses like underwear and refusing to sign his acknowledgment of service unless i changed the grounds!!! upon advice from my solicitor he advised that due to grounds of unreasonable behaviour i can have him served personally ,usually a sheriff or private dick just hands him an envelope and it's job done, he is then out of the running. It goes to the court that he's been served and the process begins,all he knows about it then is when the Decree Nisi lands on him and the request for ancilliary relief!!
On the kids note,i would reconsider your stance,maybe think about a contact centre,your solicitor or judge can refer you,that way he gets contact,a few hrs and it's a safe environment,but ultimately up to you.
Hope you get things sorted good luck
Tigs x

  • sam0811
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05 Dec 07 #8479 by sam0811
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i definately dont want to allow any form of access now as i dont know what sort of things he is going to be saying to the kids as i have had some pretty abusive text messages since finding out he was with her he wasnt going to tell me as they were trying to keep it hidden and he has said there is no way he is going to agree to a divorce on any groundsas that is what i want i have tried the nice approach on if he is so loved up why not divorce and make a Clean Break to be with our respective partners but all i got to that was although he is loved up with her now he only went with her because he couldnt have me but would come back if i let him.so he is going to make this difficult for me in the hope i will go back if he waits long enough :angry:

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