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  • Mrs.heal
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23 Oct 12 #362594 by Mrs.heal
Topic started by Mrs.heal
Hello everyone, im new here and in need of advice. I moved out from my husbands flat with our daughter recently. He has been suffering from a psychotic episode which is drug related. He stopped smoking cannabis just few weeks ago before i left but i think the stuff that he last smoked triggered the episode. I just thought i needed to leave because he has been saying crazy things around me and my daughter. Before i left i took him to the gp and she was alarmed as well. I do care for my husband but i dont want my daughter to be around him right now. I am too scared. I really dont know what to do. I a 10 mos away from applying my ilr which makes it harder. I left my job, our flat and i am living at my aunts right now. I dont know if i can get any support from his family. I am in touch with his dad and no offer of any support. Now im in another city, jobless, homeless with our 6 year old and in debt. I have no rights to make any benefits claim. I considered going back to my country where i can be well supported but our safety is uncertain because a few days ago i just heard some bad news that my friend who lives in the same area as my parents got shot on what seems to be a carjacking attempt. Whats my visa status going to be if i decided not to go back to my husband? My daughter left her school as well. Our gp told me we will be referred to social services but i tried calling them and i did not get any advice at all. It''s been a week. Shall i go to a solicitor now?

  • CaringParent
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23 Oct 12 #362609 by CaringParent
Reply from CaringParent
What visa are you on?
If it is a long term vas, u may be homed.
How long have u been here ?
Ur husband has right to the child, so under international convention of family rights u will and should get ILR.
Contact :
1. Immigration lawyers.
2. Social services
3. Local council

Also, be considerate to your husband whom you care for , but do NOT put yourself or your daughter in any danger.

Respect his rights as a father if you feel that there is NO risk to the child.
Yes see a lawyer if u need to, but first decide what do you want ? DO NOT LET THE LAWYER TELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT.

What do you want ?
Please share fir further advise.


  • Mrs.heal
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23 Oct 12 #362620 by Mrs.heal
Reply from Mrs.heal
Thank you very much for your reply. As i have said, i care for him. There is no way that i will take away any rights from him when it regards to our daughter. As for me, i have been suffering long term from his ups and downs. I always end up forgiving him and be dragged to a situation where i have to hide how i really am. Before the episode, i have been suffering anyway. Its like we are living together, but i dont get any help from him. I work full time, i do all the chores i do shopping, as in everything. All he did was smoke. He have his own money. Thats not the issue. I don''t feel safe, theres no physical violence, but shouting, harsh words, insults and that would be infront of our daughter. Im just glad that my daughter didnt have to stay with him while im working. My mom in law was the one who would pick her up and feed her and look after home until before bed time. What i want is for him to accept treatment and be better at least so he can see his daughter. Until then, i dont know how to decide what to do next. I am on a spouse of visa and it will expire august next year. My daughter ofcourse holds a british passport.

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