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Sorry kids....

  • strongerthanithought
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16 May 12 #330809 by strongerthanithought
Topic started by strongerthanithought
And sorry Wikis, I feel a rant coming on..

So they''ve seen him once since Xmas, only one weekend rather than the ''every other'' as was initially agreed upon. And he promised them that he''d have them over Jubilee weekend because I needed him to commit so that I could give a difinitive ''YES or NO'' to my son going to Cub camp.

So I finally manage to shame him into confirming if he was having them last night and Lo and Behold - he''s just ''had'' to buy a new car (works in a garage so I can''t imagine he''s too badly out of pocket, and I''ve bought two old bangers since we split and still always had the kids), so he can''t possibly have them over the bank holiday.

But he can have them this weekend coming.

Am I a bloody fool or what? I know there''s no point me even offering to take the kids to his door (he lives 150 miles away) but I feel like telling him that they can''t come this time but he can have them the following time!

I''ve managed to wangle a place on cub camp, and that''s where the petrol money will be spent, but yet again, Mummy is making dad''s excuses and making things right for the kids. Daughter has a party invite that I can RSVP to now too so not all bad...

How can a father be so uninterested in his kids? There are so many Dads out there fighting to be fathers yet he just doesn''t give a damn, not called them for a fortnight, not seen them for 11 weeks...

This is from the man that told me in no uncertain terms that he would be having 50:50 shared care when we split up; they''ve spent 9 nights (over 6 visits) at his house since July last year.


Sorry for the rant, had to get it out otherwise it would eat at me all day!

  • WhiteRose
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16 May 12 #330812 by WhiteRose
Reply from WhiteRose
This is what I also don''t understand - where there are parents fighting to see their kids there are some parents that don''t seem interested :(

All I can say is well done to you for:

- Sorting out a last min place in Camp
- Not upsetting the kids by covering for Dad
- Getting rid of your feelings here

You''re doing the right thing!!

Take care

WR x

  • hottdogg
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16 May 12 #330853 by hottdogg
Reply from hottdogg
I really feel for you in your situation and for your children. I can''t fully imagine how hard it is for you trying to manage and for your children dealing with the issues that you are working hard to spare them from.

It frustrates me that I am fighting and doing all I can to see my children and that there are those who for what ever reason are disinterested.
I annoys me that I have some people telling me that I have abandoned my children when in truth it breaks me to be away from them.

I made a choice to leave my marriage. This was not me abandoning my children, but leaving a marriage in which both parents were unhappy but living for a number of years in denial. I stayed for the sake of my children for a number of years.

I have all the contact I can with my children (7&10). I email every morning when I wake, they call before school and I call every evening. I see them 3 evenings and on Saturdays...I am working to get myself in to a position to have shared residence. I love my kids more than anything in the world and do all I can for them.

I hope that you can work things out. You are doing the best you can in a difficult situation and you can be very proud of how you are handling things.

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