Writing up a proposal/draft order

Am writing up a proposal for court this Tuesday.

I''m struggling a little as to what should be included? and what the format looks like.

Also i''m not going to find out my University timetable until a few weeks later away. So if i was to ask for midweek contact I can''t say a specific day that i''ll be wanting.

Also i''m looking to move up in the next 14 days. I did have a property sorted for me to live in but that has now fallen through. I''ll be looking at shared housing for now before i can find somewhere more suitable. But with being in shared housing and no appropriate address how do I go about the long term proposals?

Thanks in Advance

ffc1991

May i ask how the alternate birthdays christmas usually works?

Not sure how it usually works and obviously writing up my proposals which my EX partners sol has asked for.

Thanks in advance

ffc,

I just wrote you a really long post and then lost it!! Try again.

I think focusing too much on your long term proposals and shared residence is a red herring, and in fact is taking up pointless time and energy. The court is not going to put in any court order now where you will be working towards, and anything coiuld happen. For the hear and now you need to focus on the next few steps of contact and secure your contact order and review hearing.

Proposals: I would so something along the lines of.

It has been agreed by both myself and the respondent that the ultimate aim of conatct is for it to be increased to alternate weekends Fri to Sun, and x evening / overnights during the week, 50/50 holidays and alternate Xmas & birthday. The disagreement is how to reach this level of contact

I would like to propose that contact increases from the current 1 hour to 2 hours 1:30 - 3:30pm. Unforunately my current contact conflicts directly with daughters current routine as provided by the respondent. I believe this is not in daughters best interests, and it would be better if my contact could complement her routine rather than disrupt it. I therefore propose to start contact at 1:30pm allowing me to feed daughter her 2pm bottle (I will quite happily buy new ready sterilised disposable bottles for this if respondent would prefer not to supply the formula & bottles). I will then also have time to spend some play and down time with daughter before facilitating her nap, and then returning her to the respondent in time for her tea. This will allow me to start to develop a full parental role for daughter rather than just a "fun dad"

As all evidence suggests that little and frequent contact is best for children of daughters age, I would like contact to take place weekly rather than fortnightly.

Unfortunately due to the contact centre policies they do not allow contact of more than 1 hour to take place at the centre for children under 14months of age. I would therefore propose that contact moves outside the centre. I would prefer handovers to take place amicably with the respondent, but would be equally happy to do handovers via the centre if the respondent would prefer.

I would request a review of this in 6 weeks, allowing myself and the respondent to "iron out" any concerns, and ensure they can be reviewed quickly.

Longer term I would be looking to continue this patter of contact for 8 weeks, and then 2 weeks after the review I would be looking to increase contact by 1 hour every 2 weeks until contact reached a full day 9:00am until 6:30pm, this again would facilitate daughters current routine and allow me to take a full and active part in all areas of her life.

After a further period of 3 months, I would be looking to trial the first overnight to take place on a weekend collecting daughter at 9am on the Saturday and returning at 9am on the Sunday every fortnight. The alternate weeks contact would remain at 9am until 6:30pm on Saturday.

A further 3 months on I would be looking to increase this to an additional weekend night so 9am on Saturday to 9am on Monday (or drop a nursery) or 5pm on a Friday until 6:00pm on Sunday alternate weekends, and swap the full day Saturday contact in the intervening weeks to 2 evenings instead 4 - 6pm.

With regards to holidays, I am well aware that the overnights will have to be built up slowly to accommodate daughters needs. I would therefore be proposing, that next year I have 5 3 dayy periods with daughter, to be increased to 4 nights the following easter, 5 in the summer, and the year after have blocks of 7.

I propose the respondent has Christmas this year 6pm Xmas eve until 6pm Xmas day,. I would have 6pm Xmas day until 6pm Boxing Day.This would be reversed the following year and repeated every year after.

Thanks halfadad replied to you via PM.

However on your point about shared residence, I personally am anxious about asking for it but the McKenzie friend ive seeked for Tuesday has advised me to ask for it on Tuesday but to expalin that I want the shared residence in place to reflect the sahred importance of both parents but to explain that it is not an applciation of a 50/50 split of time.

My only concern with the shared residence application is
a) they are still rare although becoming more common
b) yes there has been a shared residence order for a chap with contact in a contact centre, but the odds on that are very slim
c) its going to antagonise your ex - and whilst at some point it may have to be done at this point in time is it worth it?
d) it may way deflect focus away from what you are asking for.

The most important thing right now has to be securing better contact with your child, arguing over a label can be done at a later date.

Youre free to ignore me though

Im just popping out now but will have a nose at your PM when i return.

Hello see what your saying and in sense i agree with you. However would it not come across as aggressive to ask for it at a later date? Especially if contact is going well and had no problems. If i suddenly ask for a shared residence order then i''m gonna look unreasonable etc. As i''m moving home now to be closer to my daughter I have a reason to change the application, in future I may not have a valid reason froc ahnging the order? and ok no problem

May I ask do i send a coy of this proposal to the court/judge before the hearing? I suppose if he were to know what I was asking for before I went in it would take up less time lol.