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Complications with Consent order and Debts

  • Wwoman75
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25 Aug 20 #513823 by Wwoman75
Topic started by Wwoman75
First of all, I just wanted to say a huge thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this and send any responses as we are really struggling to work out a way forward for my fiance's financial arrangements.

A little background:
We have a solicitor, the cost of which is really crippling us right now.
His ex wife (Decree Absolute done) had a solicitor until the beginning of this year, uncertain exactly what happened but she no longer has legal representation.
Brilliant, we thought, surely luck is on our side as she can't possibly throw any more at us, we have the law on our side.

Every single part of this process has been completely mind-bending as there is a significant factor of mental abuse, they were married over 21 years and had children together.

He obtained his decree absolute last year through the solicitor as we decided it would be best to get that done and continue with the rest of the process to ascertain a share in the house which he worked hard for during the whole marriage.

We had already come to the conclusion that he was unlikely to get what we considered to be a fair share of the assets (a house), there is a considerable amount of debt in the form of a mortgage, a second mortgage and a secured loan. The mental stress of this process (it has been going on all the time we have been together, over 3 years) is taking its toll and he is now of the mind that he just wants it done, regardless of whether he actually gets anything at the end. We have been advised due to the debts he can't just stop the process and say she can have everything when the time comes because his name is attached to it.

At present his ex is refusing to sign the Consent Order, which gives him a 30% share when their youngest reaches 18. It feels as though we will be pouring money into a solicitor (not a cheap one either if there is such a thing, she is a senior partner) for his ex to keep refusing (she will find any excuse under the sun not to sign) and maybe never get to the end of this process, in which case we have reached a stalemate.

What can we possibly do now to make a step forward?
Any extra info needed please ask, I am exhausted with this whole situation myself as I have also been dealing with my stubborn ex husband in the background......
Many thanks

  • hadenoughnow
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  • Moderator
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06 Sep 20 #514019 by hadenoughnow
Reply from hadenoughnow
If the Consent Order is not agreed, you don't have consent. You will just waste more money on letters etc that get you nowhere. I would suggest that you consider making an application to court and self representing at least in the early stages. You can still reach a settlement at any point. The application will put you in the court timetable so there will be a settlement imposed if yiy cannot agree.

NB mediation has to be tried before you can apply.

Give the helpline a call to see how we can assist with this and the court paperwork.


  • Wwoman75
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07 Sep 20 #514027 by Wwoman75
Reply from Wwoman75
Thank you for your advice, much appreciated.

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