Please could someone help?

So, I left my husband at the end of March and he's not coping at all with the situation. I am all too aware of the roller coaster from Hell of emotions, but this is really, really difficult.
He's pretty much been drinking since Saturday afternoon. Today since 9am. I've had one very abusive phone call, 3 text messages and the last phone call was telling me that if he killed himself his blood would be on my hands and I would have to live with what I had done for the rest of my life as I've destroyed his life, our kids and our family, all because of my selfishness.

I've sent a friend round to make sure he's ok - (which I know he's not!)
What can I do?! I am the person who left, I cannot be the person who consoles him too. Our situation is made more dire by us being in a foreign country and he has very few friends here and doesn't speak the language. It's also the time of year when he needs to work to get some money (gardening) but I think the drinking episode on Saturday might have cost him one of his jobs.

It's a mess. A flipping massive mess. And at the epicentre I have two very frightened children (who are now with me - they were with my husband until this morning - me unaware he'd been drunk for all this time.)

Hello Duchess. Sorry to read about the situation you find yourself in. Hearing suicide threats is scary and stressful.

However, his actions and behaviours are his own choices. It can be difficult not to hold yourself responsible when you have someone threatening to kill themselves and saying that it would be your fault, but it certainly would not be. You should never feel that you are responsible for your partner’s life, or that you have to do what they tell you to keep them from hurting themselves. It was responsible to ask someone to check on him. Can others be called upon to keep a watch out for him? Can he return home to family?

Can someone persuade him to talk to the Samaritans? He would understand them and they would listen. (08457 90 90 90) How about his family? Are they aware of the situation and can they help?

There is also a long list of support agencies on this website.
www.supportline.org.uk/problems/suicide.php

Hi Duchess,
I was in a similar situation five years ago when I left my STBX. He was a controlling, manipulative, depressed alcoholic who projected all his anger, sadness and insecurities onto me. I too had the "guilt trip" messages and phone calls about how I was responsible should anything happen to him, It would be my fault that the children were from a broken home and they would suffer as a result of my decision to leave him etc etc. It was very difficult to emotionally detach from the situation, but that's what got me through. You can't be the one that supports him through this. You did the right thing by getting a friend to keep an eye on him. You need to focus on yourself and your children.

My STBX came through the other side and although seems to have got a grasp with the drinking and depression, he is still very bitter. I waited such a long time to initiate divorce simply because I didn't want to kick the man when he was down, fear for his mental health etc. He probably would have just signed everything over to me if I had done it then because he was at such a low point in his life. Now I feel like I have created a monster, he will fight me all the way to a final hearing just out of resentment and anger.

My advice is don't take the gently, gently approach like I did because of ex's emotional wellbeing... there's probably more suffering the longer it all takes. Focus on yourself and your children.

Hi, little update first.
I took some food round yesterday morning to find him drunk again. I left and retuned with the doctor who promptly drove him to hospital to be assessed for psychiatric care. (Thankfully he consented otherwise they'd have sectioned him.)
He calleda few time yesterday asking me to come and get him. I didn't. Today he left the hospital (they can't hold him just now as they felt he wasn't suicidal.) and started walking the 15miles back (its 33°c and he's hungover... ) thankfully I found him and drove him back. He's been given stronger antidepressants and stuff to make him sick if he drinks.

He's not been manipulative or nasty to me during our marriage, he is a good man. I'm the one who has changed and wants to take a different route in life.

The pleeding and sorrow this afternoon was hellish once again. "I will change, i promise you'd be happy, we can fall in love again. You can't just walk away from 18yrs." All the things that twist that knife even further for me. It utterly breaks my heart. Devastates me seeing how utterly heartbroken and grief stricken he is.