waiting to exhale...

Please tell me I'll be able to breathe freely once my divorce comes through!

My husband cheated on me and despite me giving him two chances to forget her and work on our marriage he chose her so I kicked him out.

He's living with her now, which is why I don't get why he wouldn't return the Acknowledgement of Service form or even talk about it with me. I've now changed reason from 'adultery' to 'unreasonable behaviour' so a bailiff can present him with the Petition and we can go for deemed service if he ignores this one.

I feel like I'm spending my life waiting to hear what's happening with the petition and am seriously hoping that once I have that Decree Absolute in my hand I'll finally be able to move on properly.

I have a wonderful boyfriend now who is obviously keen for the divorce to go through (it can't be nice for him while I'm married to someone else after all!) and an amazing daughter, both of whom bring a smile to my face when I'm with them, but when I'm on my own all I can think about is this bloody divorce and it's making me feel very stressed an anxious!

I'm just hoping that I'll be able to breathe a sigh of relief once this is over...does anyone have any coping strategies for in the meantime? Or can anyone reassure me that it will feel better once it's all completed? Thank you.

You will be able to breath a sigh of relief once it's all over although it hits different people differently however it may be longer than you anticipate before you are free, my divorce was relatively simple and amicable but took 17 months from filing to Absolute (mainly due to hold ups with Consent Order). I got better at putting it to the back of my mind as time went on and I got used to the delays and long waits between submitting documents and the courts replying but every time I got a letter or email a certain panic set in and left me shaken for a few hours or days depending what it was about. I am still waiting for the pension share to be finalised and am relatively calm and resigned to the fact that it will happen at some point, time and experience of the system helped me as well as taking control so that I knew when things were submitted. The support of Wiki so I had somewhere to vent or ask questions was invaluable.
Focus on the good parts of your life and keep the divorce stuff business like - keep it on your desk not in your head.

Clawed wrote:

Focus on the good parts of your life and keep the divorce stuff business like - keep it on your desk not in your head.

Love that phrase - thank you! Just what I needed to help re-focus my mind towards the many positive things in my life!
It's been a tough year, setting out as a single mum and then my elderly father passing away and I've felt very lonely at times. I'm loving wikivorce for giving me the support I really need

Good luck Nearlymiss. My divorce lasted 3 years, while still living under the same roof ! Everything that could go wrong well.. went wrong!
About to finally hopefully eventually sell and move on!
At least you have a supporting and loving boyfriend.
Wikivorce has been a tremendous help and sanity check to me too.
My philosophy: whatever life throws at you... keep smiling! (even if it means having a good cry once in a while).