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  • Fiona
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  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
12 Aug 12 #349012 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
Not entering into negotiation or making offers is counter-productive. All your wife will do is start court proceedings and then you will have to negotiate and make offers. Otherwise you could be at the wrong end of a costs order requiring you to pay your wife''s legal bills. Also at the moment there are several factors that maybe in your favour (your wife is cohabiting, the children are living with you, you have no income) and circumstances may change.

Children under 18 are the priority, but over 18s in education aren''t irrelevant and it isn''t unreasonable for them to be provided with a base even if they don''t live there full time or take a gap year after uni. What you could do is negotiate a settlement and if your wife is already housed her interest in the matrimonial property might be held as a chargeback until the youngest has finished uni.

When sharing assets a good starting point is to consider how you are both to be housed. Although your wife is living with someone else her contributions to the marriage will be deemed equal and she is going to be entitled to something. She can''t make claims against a co-habitant and a court would want to ensure she doesn''t suffer undue hardship should the relationship fail. Both of you are going to have difficulties getting mortgages for the usual 25 year term, and unless your wife has a pension fund neither of you have much in the way of provision for retirement.

Although you aren''t earning at the moment one factor taken into account is your potential income.

  • james59
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16 Aug 12 #349814 by james59
Reply from james59
OK, I bit the bullet and met up with her last night. Not a nice experience as I am sure you can all imagine.
I have no problem with the divorce and handed over the marriage certificate for her to start proceedings with irreconcilable differences, 2 years apart as the reason to be stated.
Financially she wants 50% of the equity in the house and says she will provide a bed for any of the children should they need it in the future. Not concerned with my housing needs or, in reality, the children as "they are old enough to look after themselves".
Should I just give in and accept my fate or is it worth the fight? Feedback appreciated!
I think I have had enough.

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