2 year separation or unreasonable behaviour??

Hi,

I have drafted my Petition on unreasonable behaviour grounds and thought I had been quite light touch about it. However, I have shown it to my ex and ad I have mentioned finances he says he won''t respond as thinks could affect his financial settlement.

He wants me to file the petition on grounds of 2 year separation by consent. I have read through the criteria for this and certainly meet some of them (separate bedrooms and finances), however we have had a couple of reconciliation attempts, during that time, had a holiday together 18 months ago now and had been doing joint meals together until a couple of months ago

I just want this over with as soon as possible, should I just agree to file a separation Petition, and leave out the contentious bits??

Thanks.

Hi there,
Can''t give you a lot of advice as I''m still going through this but I do know in the end it won''t matter one iota whether he wants to respond or not! My stbx is an alcoholic and told me himself he would ignore my Petition as in his mind it would stop the process - WRONG!! Admittedly he first got the petition in February and had been steadily ignoring it, but eventually we got a bailiff who he somehow managed to dodge and in the end a udge deemed service this week. It has been a long and S L O W process; he shot himself in the foot by ringing my sol direct and saying if she sent him another set of papers he would sign this time, he had no intention of, of course, but the fact he knew who my solicitor was and how to contact her directly certainly helped my case!
I also toned down my petition too (UB), I was genuinely afraid of any potential for violence but I found a happy medium I could live with; the facts only with very little emotion, no accusations or recriminations, I felt I got to say my bit but tbh 5 years from now, realistically who will ever read this stuff anyway? And will any of it even matter by then? Go with what your heart tells you but don''t let yourself be bullied by him. Start your new life as you mean to go on, and GOOD LUCK & MUCH LOVE xx

It is my understanding that during separation you shouldnt be having joint meals or holidays together. Also, you need your stbx''s consent.

Unreasonable behaviour can be used without consent, and even if your ex doesnt agree to it, you can have the papers served and apply for deemed service if necessary and it will, in most circumstances, go ahead without permission.

I would be tempted to follow the path that would inevitably end up in a divorce, without having to rely on someone who already appears to be being difficult!!

Thanks for your reply, he said he''ll consent, but then he may well change his mind, and evidence could be an issue, so yes I will continue along on the UB path for now x

he says he will ignore it as it I have mentioned about the fact that he has regularly failed to communicate to me