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1st joint mediation appointment

  • dr1971
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9 years 1 month ago #276167 by dr1971
1st joint mediation appointment was created by dr1971
Hi all

Attended the dreaded joint mediation appointment today, very nervous as not seen my ex for nearly 2 years, i live with my two 15 yr old children in family home, he left to live with my best friend, they have since bought a house worth £100k, no children with them. I live in the fsmily home which is worth approx £120,000, of which we have a mortgage outstanding of £50,000. We have 2 endowment policies valued at £10K and £17k, he has pensions totalling £59,000, i dont have any pension provision. I receive £700 per month maintenance at present. After an hour and a half this is the conclusion, he signs over the house and the £17,000 endowment to me, he gets the £10k endowment and he keeps his pensions . He would also drop the monthly maintenance to £400.00 per month. Just wanting some feedback to see what peoples views are on this. I have a part time job earning £8k he earns £25k plus his partners income. We were married 18 years when he upped and left me and the kids for my best friend, the closest non relative to my kids, who, ue to the circumstances surrounding the separation , do not see their dad at present. Des anybody have an opinion on wether this seems a fair division. HELP!!!!

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  • TBagpuss
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9 years 1 month ago #276501 by TBagpuss
Replied by TBagpuss on topic Re:1st joint mediation appointment
Ok the assets seem to be £97K (equity plus endowments) plus £59K in pension.

I assume that there is no significant equity in the proeprty he and his partner has bought.

On his offer, you get assets worth £87K, he gets assets worth £10K plus £59K pension.

He also earns more than double what you do.

How much are each of you paying in mortgage payments each month?
What would your earning capacity be if you were to work full time, and is there any reason why you would not be able to work full time?
Do you have other income (child benefit, tax credits etc)

you also need to look at what will happen in the future - is your mortgage a repayment or interest only one? If it's interest only, how are you going to pay it off? Can you afford the mortgage and other outgoings if the maintenace falls?
Do you anticipate moving to a smaller property once the children leave school?

I think the division you've set out would fall within the range of fair outcomes, but it's quite a wide range, so I think you do need to look at the practical effect s for you, to see whether you feel it is going to work.

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9 years 1 month ago #276544 by dr1971
Replied by dr1971 on topic Re:1st joint mediation appointment
Hi and thanks for your reply

Equity in house he has purchased with his new partner is approx £30k, i pay £350.oo per month mortgage, he pays about £400. My job is only a part time job, not enough work for full time position, i have worked their 13 years, i receive some tax credits and child benefit equating to approx £700 per month. My mortgage is part endowment £34,000 and rest repayment so the endowment i would keep is to be used to pay off some off the endowment mortgage on maturity. I would not be able to buy a smalle house, for less money than is owed on my current home.

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9 years 1 month ago #276551 by happyagain
Replied by happyagain on topic Re:1st joint mediation appointment
So, incomes are as follows:
Ex - 25k minus 4800 pa in CM = 20200 pa
You - 8k earnings plus 8400 tax credits and CB plus 4800 CM = 21200 pa

This puts you on roughly the same although you have the added cost of the children living with you full-time. However, they are both 15 and will not be at home forever.
The endowment will allow you to reduce your mortgage significantly. You also get to continue working part-time.

I would say that this offer is very favourable to you, although not outside the boundaries of 'fair'. If I were in your position, I'd definitely accept this one!

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