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Mediation after abuse

  • wiki999
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2 months 1 week ago #512271 by wiki999
Mediation after abuse was created by wiki999
My ex partner is trying to engage me in Mediation.
This is all the wrong way around.
Domestic abuse - non physical, arrest of ex (no charges), non molestation order for a year, social services involvement and now child contact issues.

Because he denies abuse, i didnt press charges (just wanted out), he thinks that we can start mediation now.

With a non molestation order, I was exempt from mediation. Doesn't work in an abusive dynamic / power imbalance situation.

Can he insist on mediation now?

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  • VeeCee
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2 months 1 week ago #512274 by VeeCee
Replied by VeeCee on topic Mediation after abuse
My stbx is the bully verbally and violent temper outbursts , I went to mediation on my own for the first session after telling the Mediator about his violence and he could see that I was afraid to be anywhere near him he recommended NO to joint mediation . I had to pay the initial fee for this my ex once again got off with any of the cost

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  • hadenoughnow
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2 months 1 week ago #512275 by hadenoughnow
Replied by hadenoughnow on topic Mediation after abuse
There are types of mediation where you and your ex can be kept separate from each other e.g. Shuttle mediation where the mediator goes between rooms.

In cases of domestic abuse you are exempt from the requirement to have tried mediation before making an application to court for financial remedy.

Hadenoughnow

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  • wiki999
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2 months 1 week ago #512280 by wiki999
Replied by wiki999 on topic Mediation after abuse
Thank you for sharing your experience. There is no point in trying to mediate with a controlling person, especially if they are manipulative. If you are physically scared too, that must have been quite a relief for you to not have to go further!

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2 months 1 week ago #512281 by wiki999
Replied by wiki999 on topic Mediation after abuse
Thank you! Yes. I think he is just trying to use the system to prove that we can communicate, which obviously you cant with the unbalance of power.

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  • hadenoughnow
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2 months 1 week ago #512283 by hadenoughnow
Replied by hadenoughnow on topic Mediation after abuse
You refer to partner - were you married?

Do you have a reasonable picture if your ex's financess and your respective needs?

If you do, it may be worth booking a legal financial consultation just to see where you stand. Have a look at the services tab.

If you don't, disclosure will need to be forced via the court process if he isn't playing ball. Again we can help with this.

Hadenoughnow

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