The Divorce Route

Hope someone can help here

Me and my wife have talked about seperating although it is me that wants to leave I could do with some pratical advice.


1. Joint bank account

As I pay all the bills though our joint bank account how do I ensure that the account is not abused as I obviously dont want to get into depbt as it will be a shared debt can I remove my name from the account due to seperating.


2. There are children involved however they are not mine

As the real father has not paid a bean and they were never married where do I stand with regards to maintainence of the children they were 4 and 5 when we married now 11 & 13.
I did not foster them and they still have the Maiden Name of my wife ?
If possible I want to still want to be involved with the childrens developement but I cant see this being possible this is one of the main arguments we have as the In laws have been involved with the development of the children since birth as my wife was single and we have very different views.


3. Property
As the father in law owns the property we live in and I pay the rent again what if any rights do I have Im happy to walk away without pressing for anything but I do not want to be responsable for the rent or the up keep of the house

4. Seperation
Divorce is not iminent as there is no one else involved we have just grown apart and theres no reason for us being miserable therefore I want to leave as ammicable as possible, Ive tried this several times but emotional blackmail and guilt has made me stay for the past year especially for the kids sake but it is time now to move on and any advise would be appreciated

Hi,
1. you can remove your name but only with the written consent of your wife, otherwise you will need to ask for a seperate account to transfer the bills to and inform the bank that you wish the joint account to be suspended.

2. as regards the children, as you are not the father you will not be liable for them.

3. as the property is rented and always has been, you will not be entitled to any equity in the property or liable once you leave for any rent.

4. if you can sort things out between you, it would really help, both financially and mentally.
hope this helps
dawn

Hi pure quo,

Just thought I'd add my take on the children and, more importantly, what I believe the court's point of view will be.
You have looked after the children during your marriage and you will still be deemed to be responsible for them financially to some extent.
Never mind that the biological father has not looked after them.
As to how far that responsibility goes, I am not sure.

There is a legal person on here who could tell you exactly, but she is absent for the moment. ( we need you amanda ! )

What I do know is that you cannot just walk away from them.

Hope that clarifies things (a bit)
Red XX