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Mediation, does it work?

  • LisaW
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5 months 1 day ago #511322 by LisaW
Mediation, does it work? was created by LisaW
Hello,

This is on behalf of my partner. He and his wife split up 10 years ago. She had a high paid job in a well known bank. They had 4 children between them; two that his wife had from a former marriage and two they had together. My partner raised all 4 children as his own and he and his family supported his wife so she could attend college and then climb the career ladder. The intention was she was the main earner while he worked around the family. The [url=Resources/Library/Cohabitation-and-Separation_s33_m1852.html ]separation[/url] was acrimonious and contact has been minimal.

The family house has been sold and proceeds split 50/50, the children have grown up, his wife is now living in Scotland. The divorce is being applied in Scotland. My partner is living in rented accommodation and has ran up £14K in solicitor bills and they are still not divorced. His wife is living comfortably and mortgage free. Personally I think he has been badly advised by his solicitor but that's another story.

The only asset left is her bank pension, she has never disclosed the full amount. I realise that Scottish law is different and the pension as an asset is only during the marriage and also valued as at the time of [url=Resources/Library/Cohabitation-and-Separation_s33_m1852.html ]separation[/url]. When they first split up they agreed 50/50 of everything but his wife is now disputing this now.

Whilst I realise the law is on her side I wondered whether Mediation would be beneficial in this case. It could be said she has a moral duty as she would not have been able to achieve her financial status without the help of my partner or his very supportive family. As said above, he doesn't have any spare money and is working hand to mouth. Could mediation bring him some financial benefit and the divorce they both must want?

Any advice or experiences would be very much appreciated. Thank you. (It's difficult to get on with our own lives with this hanging over us).

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  • LisaW
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4 months 3 weeks ago #511402 by LisaW
Replied by LisaW on topic Re:Mediation, does it work?
Please can anyone give advice or experience, desperate to know what to do next......

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  • hadenoughnow
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4 months 2 weeks ago #511457 by hadenoughnow
Replied by hadenoughnow on topic Re:Mediation, does it work?
If the divorce and financial settlement are under Scottish jurisdiction, I don't think there is much leeway on how assets of the marriage are treated.

You really need to speak to a specialist in Scottish Family Law.

You could give the helpline a call.


Hadenoughnow

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  • LisaW
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4 months 2 weeks ago #511461 by LisaW
Replied by LisaW on topic Re:Mediation, does it work?
Thank you, I agree, the law is on my partner's wife's side but he's hoping to appeal to her morals. That is he brought up her two children as his own whilst she went climbed the career ladder and is now in a very comfortable financial position. The law states how the assets should be split but I should imagine this could be split however the couple agree?

The divorce has been ongoing for several years and got nowhere as his wife has not disclosed the pension value. My partner has paid around £12K in legal fees to get no where so far.

Thank you very much for input.

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  • rubytuesday
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4 months 2 weeks ago #511470 by rubytuesday
Replied by rubytuesday on topic Re:Mediation, does it work?
Hi Lisa

I've read your various posts, and so that I can help you, I have a couple of questions, if that's ok?

In one post you said the other side had instigated divorce proceedings under Scots law some years ago - did your husband receive any paperwork relating to this, either from her solicitor or the sheriff court?

under Scots law, divorce can not be applied for until the financial matters and child arrangements have been resolved and set out in a [url=Resources/Library/Cohabitation-and-Separation_s33_m1852.html ]separation[/url] agreement (historically called a minute of agreement). In some cases, where there are no marital assets, an [url=Glossary/General/Affidavit.html ]affidavit[/url] stating this is usually sufficient.

Hadenhoughnow is right that the law in Scotland facilitates a fairly even split - usually 50/50, there can be various deviencies to this, upon agreement between the parties, or from a Sheriff if the matter has gone to court. Assets are those accrued during the duration of the marraige, and there is a formula for apportioning the pension. The value of the pension is divided by the total number of years contributions were made to the pension and that figure is then multiplied by the number of years contributions were paid into the fund during the marriage. Once the value of the fund apportioned to the marriage has been determined it is shared \"fairly,\" usually 50:50.

Surely there is some sort of paper trail to show that the other assets were shared on an even basis?

If no divorce papers have been issued, then your husband can apply to the Sheriff court (usually the one closest to the other party), under the ordinary procedure for divorce, and as part of the writ, request that the court also deal with the outstanding financial matters.

Mediation in Scotland is slightly different to that in England/Wales - it's more a therapeutic intervention. In any case, the distance between the parties could most likely preclude mediation sessions.

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  • LisaW
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4 months 2 weeks ago #511471 by LisaW
Replied by LisaW on topic Re:Mediation, does it work?
Thank you for your reply.

We need to collect the paperwork to go through the correspondence and chronological order to answer your questions, my partner is unsure of what happened when.

As a matter of interest, they can't currently divorce under the simplified process as they need to sort out the pension, their only remaining asset. Would that mean divorce papers have not yet been lodged with a Scottish court, either the simplified or ordinary as nothing has been agreed yet? I thought that financial matters needed to be resolved BEFORE you could get divorced in Scotland. As this has yet to happen could that mean there legal proceedings of divorce have yet to be initiated in Scotland thus leaving the option to proceed under English law?

Thank you in anticipation and much appreciation.

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