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Considering ending my marriage after 2 years

  • funkymom
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25 May 12 #332867 by funkymom
Topic started by funkymom
Hi everyone, Im new to the site and looking for some advice.Im so unhappy and need to do something. I will give you a brief outline of my relationship..I live in a rented home and have 2 teenage children. I met my Husband 9 years ago when he came to work in the area from another part of the country. He moved in practically straight away. He has his own home back in his hometown but rents it out. We co habited for around 7 years before we got married.During this time he inherited a very large sum of money. He paid off his morgage and has a very healthy bank balance plus bonds etc. He has a very well paid job and rent coming in from his house. I have worked fulltime throughout our relationship. The problem with my marriage is that he is so tight with money.The more he gets the tighter he becomes. He only pays the monthly rent on this house and the tv/internet/phone bill. I have to pay everything else. All the bills are in my name alone.
I became ill with a disease last year and had to reduce my working week to part time which He complained about bitterly but he never offered me any financial support and 2 months ago I was signed off sick as the illness progressed. Hopefully I can return in the near future. But He was so angry when I told him the GP had signed me off and told me I had to get back to work asap with no regard that I am actually ill.Work have now told me that Im going to be demoted so he said just go and get another job..but im ill who is gonna want to employ me..Its hard for fit/healthy people at the moment to find work.. Any money he gives me is deemed as a loan..I have no money and the bills are piling up..Im considering a dro as a option because I just cant pay anything..He is sat on thousands and complains if he has to part with £5 for anything..Im terrifed to ask for money to pay the bills as he is so unapproachable. I have no access to any of his finances, I dont even know how much he earns.. On top of all this He refuses to be in the same room as a member of my Family because they dared to tell him a few home truths..He is so surly all the time..We have had sex twice since we have been married..Im so miserable and I have 2 children to support. If I divorce him will I be entitled to anything finacially? I dont know what to do...

  • LittleMrMike
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25 May 12 #332964 by LittleMrMike
Reply from LittleMrMike
Initial reaction :
1. Are you getting child support from the biological father of your children ?
2. Do you receive child benefit ?
3. Do you receive tax credits ? Have you considered having them re-assessed if your income has fallen or will fall ?
4. If you divorce, it is a very likely outcome that he will be ordered to vacate the rented home, and that in turn suggests you need to consider your likely/ possible entitlement to housing benefit/council tax benefit.
I say that he is likely to have to go because (a) the tenancy is in your name and (b) he is financially in a position to secure accommodation on his own account.
5. In any event, a '' what if '' review of your benefits with a CAB is desirable.
6. The issue of possible spousal maintenance could arise, especially if you have reduced earnings due to disability.

  • funkymom
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25 May 12 #332972 by funkymom
Reply from funkymom
Thank you I receive child support for the youngest and child benefit..My eldest is now of a age where he doesn''t qualify. I receive no benefits of anykind. Between myself and husband we earnt too much. I am now on ssp but that will eventually run out. But if I choose to go this route then I will qualify for benefits.

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