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Harassment by partner's ex wife

  • guest1911
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09 Oct 07 #4530 by guest1911
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My partners ex-wife got my phone number by having his post redirected to her address. She continuously harassed me by phone and text message all of last summer. She also phoned my work place and told the receptionist lies about me. I changed my phone number after I lost my phone, so I have no evidence of this behaviour.
In August, she got my phone number again. I have kept the number extremely restricted and nobody has access to it. She can only have obtained it by either phoning my workplace and posing as a client, or by stealing my partner’s phone bill. However, no bills have gone missing.
I now receive text messages when she is upset. These vary in quantity and are not frequent (approx 5 incidents a month) but the tone varies (abusive, rude , intimidating, suicidal). She also leaves me answer phone messages.
I have never responded and have never met her. My partner has difficulty getting access to his son, and so I have not taken any action so far. We have agreed to wait until the divorce is final.
What are my options for getting her to stop?

  • Sera
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09 Oct 07 #4531 by Sera
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You can apply for an order. You can apply under a case of 'Harrasment'. (Because you're not living with her).

However, if that makes it more difficult for your partner to see his child, you might atagonise a 'situation'. Especially if in the future, you may be a part of co-parenting the child.

Sometimes, women are in a lot of pain (espcecially if you're the reason he left?)It sounds to me like your partner has not given her the 'emotional closure' she NEEDS!

If you've taken up with a bloke that's divorcing, you'll understand that because Divorce is not yet granted, he is still 'involved' with another woman. (Even if that 'involvement' is just financial, legal or through the child).

In an ideal world, we'd all part company with nice hand shakes, pecks on cheeks wishing each other a fabulously happy future.

Sadly, this is not the case. She may look into her childs eyes, and miss his dad...

If it is just five texts a month, then have the strength to just overlook them. (I know it's hard!)

Otherwise, a court will order that you she doesn't pester you, and could attach a 'power of arrest' to her breaking the Order.

The laws an 'ass' on this one.. most of us have the process of Non-Molestation going thru' court, (me too!) which is usally what's brought to a court, when one of the parties wants rid of the other.

I think Time will heal... she sounds vitriolic and upset. But, as an outsider, I kind of understand that, especially if she's not found someone new for herself.

Taking action, might be one course to stop the calls, but it may also fuel the fire. Maybe just detach from letting her calls / texts 'get' to you.

I don't see what difference it makes, whether or not the divorce is finalised?


  • gone1
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10 Oct 07 #4550 by gone1
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Hi guest911. I agree with Sera. Just leave it for now. I have also been on the receiving end of a non mol and its not a nice place to be. But it has not fueled any fire in my belly ha ha. If you can find a way to just forget these txt's for now that would be your best option. Some phones can block numbers. RTFM. Chris.

  • tiesys
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10 Oct 07 #4551 by tiesys
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Totaly agree.

My wife sent me an abusive text so sent her two in return. Got arrested and interviewed and released without charge but all it did was to annoy me even more.

When the texts come through can you see who they are from and don't read them? - try and keep them for evidence later though.


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