Does she have access to my pension

Hi,
I'm a copper who is forced to divorce my wife for unreasonable behaviour because I can't prove adultery.....Im 35 on £36,000 and she is 28 on £22,000.
I left our home in February 10 and live away now from the home for which I have been locked out of anyways.
We were co habiting 4 1/2 years and of that 18months married. My pension is 9 years in. Does she really have access and if so how much to my pension from our short marriage??
Also she has her lover moved into the house with her now.. (I know he himself is a married man and can't therefore stay all the time) but the house has very little equity like just under £10K in it.. I am thinking should I go for the house.. She said she would take over the mortgage and get my name off but she hasn't taken steps to do this. I also contacted the mortgage provider and they informed me the mortgage was in arrears by one month and due payment so I paid it.. I feel sick that I am paying for her to keep her house and that she has lover boy in there too with her... Is there any chance of me winning mortgage over her and buying her out??
PS luckily there are no children concernd!!!!!!!

Hiya Cuddly (or should I call you PC Bear ),

How much is the mortgage?

If she wants to take on the mortgage the banks/BS will need to give her a mortgage in her own name, unfortunately its not so easy now-a-days to get a mortgage - so the decision could be made for her! If she missed a mortgage payment she seems to be struggling already

If this continues, she stays in the house and as the jointly liable person the mortgage company would chase you for the payments - not a great situation!

As you're the higher earner, I'm assuming you're in a better position to get a sole mortgage.

I've just been through this with my ex - I bought him out of the house. I paid him off the few thousand he was entitled to from the equity, applied for and got a mortgage in my own name, paid the conveyancing solicitor to transfer over the title deeds and here I am (totally skint, but happy )

How far along the divorce process are you?

Have you considered a Consent Order (Clean Break)?

WR

Let me see.. The mortgage is £145,000. I did want to go for adultery but couldn't prove it.. She acknowledges the Unreasonable behaviour and doesn't challenge any of that which in so many words implies her cheating ways..

Bit stuck and don't know what to do.. I mean if my pension is safe then I will go for the house but then again it may not be so Simples!!!

Her lover the man who is in all of this has or appears to have moved in to my house.. I feel sick to the teeth that I'm bailing her out with lover boy in my house!! I suspect he earns similar or more than me though..

Thank you for your response.. Nice to not feel so alone again...

Not sure what a consent order is but will look it up now.. I can't beleive that this has happened.. I feel so stressed and vulnerable.. My only peace of mind is the order of severence I had done on the mortgage.. I understand that the mortgage company can only now chase me up for 50% mortgage value..

like a fool I told her that I would pay the divorce jsut to get rid of her.. Originally it was thought there was too little equity in the house so I said she could keep it if she left my pension.. Now morally I don't want her benefitting from living with lover boy or renting out my house which she can't remove me (from the mortgage) cause she can't afford to....

PS Pc Bear will do but AKA Cuddley (don't know why.. I lost loads of weight over this one!!!!)

Hi PC Bear!

Big Cuddles for you!

You're not alone here ..........

It sucks that her new fella is benefitting from the house you're paying for.

Research is a good thing to do, paint a financial picture of you both and see if you can draw up a reasonable division of assets and provisions.

Because you were together only a short amount of time she should only expect to walk away with what she came to the marriage with.

I doubt that she could claim on your pension because she hasn't had the situation where she had to give up work to provide for the children and therefore not built up a pension herself.

Take your documentation (financial picture drawn up, incomings outgoings of you both etc.) and find a solicitor who will give you a free 30 mins and see what they advise legally (the more research and pre-prepared questions and information you have, you'll get the most out of the free time!).

You said you've lost weight (I lost over 2 stone) on the divorce diet. For me it was the positive I built on

Seems like you're a nice guy she took advantage of - its a tough climb back up out of this - but you'll make it.

Take care

WR