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somewhat unusual

  • shercat
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20 Mar 12 #319060 by shercat
Topic started by shercat
This is a somewhat different prospect. My future ex and I lived together for three years and were together in the marriage for five years and have been separated for over 20 years! We have one adult daughter (in her 30''s). I raised her on benefits mostly. I allowed him to see her whenever he wanted let him come to family celebrations, Christmas etc. I just wanted to avoid the awful fighting I had seen others go through and the damage it did to the children. He carried on with his career and I let him to try and make sure there was a reasonable relationship with our daughter. He stayed in our house as he refused to leave, I went back to my parents and they helped out until I managed to get some income. He refused to help as he thought that by with-holding any financial help I would be forced to return to him. I fought hard with myself over the years to make an amicable relationship with him as long as treated my daughter properly he did his own thing. Eventually after about 10 years and 17 moves by us(myself and my daughter) the home we had shared with my ex was in such a state it was worth less than the mortgage. To cut a long story short he signed it and the insurance document (it was an endowment mortgage)over to me. I went back to college and worked very hard and managed to get a placement at a prestigious university, meanwhile I had worked hard on the house and eventually sold it and used the equity to buy a small flat near the university for my daughter and myself. I still own it without a mortgage. I am now unable to work because of illness and I am in receipt of disability benefits :(He took early retirement at approx 55 with a large lump sum and full pension ( I have no idea of the amount). I believe his salary was in the range of 30-40K and his pension was a very generous one. He also has a very large sum of money invested from the sale of his mothers home she died approx 8 years ago and left all to him. He lives with someone else in her home. He has now said we should divorce and his lawyer is drawing up the papers and they say I dont need a lawyer as I wont be getting anything as we have been apart for so long. I know for someone who had an IQ of over 150 I seem to be awfully stupid. I just never wanted to fight with him, is he right that I am not entitled to anything and I should just sign the papers..sorry this is so long...
One other question is there a difference as to whether it (the divorce) should happen in Scotland or England

  • Fiona
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20 Mar 12 #319112 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
YOu need independent legal advice, preferably from a solicitor with knowledge and experience of divorce on both sides of the border. With the passing of time it becomes more difficult to successfully claim, but it''s not impossible in England & Wales. A few years ago there was a case when someone was in similar circumstances and they were awarded a substantial amount.

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