It is not always a pleasant situation that forces you to downsize your life. One such unhappy event is divorce or separation. Not only do you have to sell your home and change your lifestyle but you are setting out on a new part of your life without your partner.
It may be a shock to discover that your marriage or long term partnership has come to an end. There are often problems with family situations as well as the knowledge that you will lose the family home and may have to move to another area. Try to stay friends with your partner as this will ease the situation and keep events calm as you plan your split.
If you are planning a divorce you need to find expert guidance not so much for the legal separation but to make sure that you receive the correct alimony and child support if there are young children involved. You need a solicitor who is conversant with family law if there is a problem over access to your children. At all times you must not use the children as a tool when negotiating the separation with your partner.
If you are unsure of what to do once it is clear you are heading for a separation from your husband speak to the Citizens Advice Bureau as they can give you information about finding divorce advice from the legal profession. If, as sadly happens, you are retired when your marriage breaks up seek help from Age Concern as they will be able to advise on your rights as a single person.
As soon as you know that your life with your partner is at an end and your home will be sold start to look for a new home. Be sensible with what you can afford to spend, have your present home valued and halve the price (after deducting any mortgage and loan payments owing).
Look for something within the money available to you and be prepared to downsize to a more realistically priced property. Remember that if you have children under school leaving age you will not have to leave your property until they are older. This is why it is imperative that you obtain good legal advice.
It may be that you will have to resume your working life in order to be able to support yourself. If your work skills are rusty make an appointment at your local Job centre for advice for skills training and how to write a CV. A part time job would give you the chance to meet new friends that weren’t part of your previous social group and you would become known as a single person rather than one half of a couple.
Look To The Future
Try not to become miserable about your divorce but think of the years ahead as an adventure, a chance to start afresh in a new home and a new job. With a positive attitude the world is your oyster.