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How Wikivorce Helped Me

How Wikivorce Helped Me
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One of our long-standing Scottish members, Biffy talks about how Wiki helped her. The best thing about Wikivorce is the people who make up our community.

The World of Wikivorce

We come from all walks of life but are all travelling on the same rocky road as we get to grips with the way our lives have changed. Perhaps the most rewarding part of being here is watching how people change and grow as they go through the process.

One 'wikipeep' who has definitely grown on all of us is the lovely Biffy, who was married for 20 years. Biffy has now been a member of the Wikivorce community for 18 months. And it seems wiki has helped her grow.. in more ways than one! “It has been so positive in every sense of the word. My friends have expanded along with my waistline (!) which comes with being happy and content again lol.”

We have followed Biffy’s story through her 32 heartfelt blogs to date, in chat, on the forum and at face to face wiki meet-ups. We have come to know and love her bubbly personality and ability to look at the bright side of life. Biffy herself says that without wikivorce, she doesn’t think she could have coped: “It has helped me see that we are never alone in our darkness no matter what kind of problems, and that we can find so much strength in others.”

Like many of us, Biffy first found Wikivorce after a friend suggested she look at the onsite maintenance calculator. The site turned out to be just what she needed: “I loved the fact that you could speak with people who were in the same boat and also those that had been through this and could be a support in time of need:” she explained..

“Blogging was so very important to me when I needed to let off steam and get some feedback, it proved to me how much my friends at Wikivorce really meant to me and that they were there when I needed them. I also liked to reply to blogs when I could and thought it would be helpful to others.”

And the chat room too was a great source of support: “The chat room meant more to me than I ever thought it would, it helped me through so many dark times during my initial separation and is helping me still, so many lovely friends to share these times with I really don't know what I would have done without it, thank you Wikivorce x”

Biffy has a very simple message for anyone who has just joined and is in the very early stages of separation:

“Like me at the beginning it all seems so very pointless and hopeless but in time (and that is what there will here, so often at Wikivorce) things start t make sense and you realise that you will be ok. Although people cannot see it for now (as I did not believe me) they will eventually get stronger for the experience they are going through albeit a bad one. They will move on to realise that all is not lost and that there are so many wonderful people in this world and who is to say that they will not be happy again! Just keep believing in yourself and get as much help as you can and surround yourself with friends who love and care for you.

If you would like to share your thoughts about Wikivorce Scotland and how it has helped you, please contact: Ruth Mackay at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

With thanks to Nicola Phipps

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