Clarisa interviews 3 single males about what they look for in a woman. Meeting the Eds for the first time they gave me some strict parameters for my first article… apparently my thoughts on writing an article on sex toys and masturbation was not quite what they were looking for in edition one.
Agreeing to behave and be tamer than I usually would be, I grabbed 3 of my male friends and took them off for a beer and a chat. My friends are Paul, 43, and in the middle of an acrimonious divorce; Dave, 37, who married at 21 and divorced in his late 20s (and currently has a girlfriend) and Jonathon, 35, who has never married, had a couple of long term things and is currently single.
I wanted to know a few things - just out of general curiosity, and things that I pondered when I was single and getting back out there… things like whether my cellulite mattered, if they really do prefer heels (or if I can stop crippling myself) and their views on dating women with children. So, beers in their hands, I settled them down, and this is what I got from them…
Starting innocently enough, I asked: Heels or flats?
Jonathon: On a woman? Whatever they feel good in. If a woman feels good wearing a sack and is confident wearing it then who am I to judge them.
Dave: Heels.
Paul: My calves really ping when I have heels on...but yeah, heels.
What do you prefer… sexy lingerie or her in your shirt?
Jonathon: Hmmm I love a woman in lingerie, but there is something about a woman in my shirt. Lingerie though. Dave: Sexy lingerie...but the other is cool too.
Paul: Rubber and gimp masks (giggling)… sexy lingerie.
Cellulite... do you even see it?
Jonathon: God no, a woman’s body is amazing, and no one is perfect.
Dave: If it's bad yeah I have in the past, yuck. It’s a big turn off.
Paul: My head doesn’t turn that far! OK, seriously once in a blue moon and it depends on how much there is.
Why do men look at other women when out with their partner?
Jonathon: Its more of a territory type thing, this is my partner, you don’t match up to her, you are good but not that good!! Or in some men, its totally the other side of the coin, why am I with her when these hotties are about!
Ouch!
Both sides of the coin there I’m afraid. I’m the former, but I would say that.
Dave: I did that when unhappy, otherwise I don't know I'm doing it.
Paul: Why do women look at other handbags when they already have 100,000?
How many times in a day do you think about your partner?
Jonathon: When I’m in a relationship I think about my partner lots of times a day – it is not countable.
Dave: About 5 times an hour-ish.
Paul: Hummm. That’s a tricky one since I don’t have one!
When you are in a relationship do you tell your male friends about your sex life?
Jonathon: No I don’t.
Dave: No...no details.
Paul: Noooo.
What are you views on women who play hard to get?
Jonathon: Depends if it’s deliberate and lasts longer than it should, sometimes it is fun… sometimes it is a pain in the arse.
Dave: They are not on same wavelength...they are not mature enough for me.
Paul: Depends if they are just playing up or if they are not interested....not interested fair enough but when they love themselves just ewwww.
Do you realise when they are doing it?
Jonathon: Yes.
Dave: Mostly...and I tell them if I think that.
Paul: Big time.
Is it acceptable to date more than one person at a time?
Jonathon: Now that’s a difficult one, I always thought no, but was told that’s ridiculous. It’s hard to call and it depends if the other person knows you are or not.
Elaborate.
Jonathon: Well if they are doing the same then it’s fine; if they think it’s exclusive then it’s not fine. Personally I don’t like doing things like that, I'm a simple man and like one woman / one man.
Dave: NO! That's a strong issue with me - and always has been.
Paul: Depends on if it’s just dating or if it’s serious on both sides.
What does it mean when you can’t get it up?
Jonathon: No idea, it has never happened…it will mean I’m dead.
Oh get you!
Jonathon: No I’m serious, it really has never happened.
Dave: Usually it is because I feel my partner is holding back with physical contact, or that I am tired and not in mood.
Paul: It means you can’t get hard.
Very funny… why?
Doesn’t mean anything but can mean you’re tired or stressed or totally pissed.
Marriage... yay or nay?
Jonathon: If it feels 100% right yay; otherwise nay.
Dave: I wouldn't see it as a priority
Paul: Is that a trick question???
No, but in your case, moving swiftly on....
Well a nay at the mo that’s for sure.
Would you again?
At this moment in time no.
What are your views on dating women with children?
Jonathon: I have no opinion either way, it’s the woman you are interested in, if they have kids it’s part of the package, the children always come first, that’s to be expected, and if they didn’t come first I wouldn’t go out with the woman.
Dave: Women with sprogs... ok if the kids aren't chavs and can at least get some time to ourselves ...some mothers' lives revolve almost totally around their kids with not much interest in the world around them and that's a big turn off and a no no for me.
Paul: Not a problem.
Interesting views, and, in many ways, different to what I expected. Now my issue is getting my bar bill through expenses…
Till next time, a big mwah!
