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Could be worse

I Updated
It's heartbreaking to think of our dauughters having grown up, learning to avoid the ex's tantrums by doing as they are told.  Walking on eggshells is a phrase from a leaflet I was given.  Perhaps they are happy enough being housed, fed, and pampered (so long as they do not challenge and/or become independent)?

from a private message I wrote today

Perhaps they are much happier now they do not hear arguing parents twice a week?

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Mitchum. Just found your kind and thoughtful response. Many thanks.

I continue in the hope that I will learn to be realistic.
When you first posted this blog I didn't think there was anything I could say to make you feel any better, but I hate to see a blog unanswered. Now I would say, actually Ignatz there are few things that could be worse than not knowing your children. Being shut out of their lives is going to mean all kinds of missing out on things.

I do hope you've sought counselling to deal with the grief of missing them. People say maintain your commitment and just be there for them when they finally realise you are a good committed father. I hope this is true for you.